


Safe and sound

by maiqueti



Category: Life Is Strange (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Polarized, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Save Chloe Ending, Survivor Guilt, kind of
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-03
Updated: 2016-02-10
Packaged: 2018-05-11 08:27:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 25,414
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5620153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maiqueti/pseuds/maiqueti
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>[ON HIATUS]</p><p>She couldn’t do it. She couldn’t just go back and undo everything, even if she was now at the brink of collapse, even if she felt like she was about to have a mental breakdown in any second. She couldn’t sacrifice her best friend, the girl she loved, with every little piece of her soul. Even if it was selfish, even if the cost was to high. Even if Chloe hated her for it, Max could go on. She could. Right?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chloe Price is here

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everybody!  
> After a little while, I'm back with a new story to share with all of you. I was amazed by the good feedback I had with my other story "Give it another shot" (http://archiveofourown.org/works/5273684) and I'll continue working on it soon, but, for now, I just wanted to explore the possibilities of one of the "Canon" endings of the game. The save Chloe one, of course.
> 
> I'm trying to write something a little more complex this time, hope you like it. And, like I always say, english is not my mother language, so I'm sure there will be more than a few mistakes, so I apologize in advance. And, if you're willing to lend me a hand and point them out, I'll be grateful.
> 
> Let me know what you think, I'll really appreciate the feedback!  
> And of course, thanks for reading!

“Take it slow, don’t push yourself too hard” Said the women in white, looking at the young brunette girl. Her expression was a mix of compassion and worry, partially hidden by a mask of emptiness.

The young girl sighed, with her gaze fixed on her hands, oddly clean and enveloped in white bandages, stained with blood. Her blood. The blood of others. Her hands filled with blood, the blood of all the people who lived here...

“Can you repeat it?” Asked the woman, interrupting her line of thought  with a smooth tone, as if she was worried to scare the girl. “Please?”

Another sigh, empty, hollow. Then, the girl nodded, cofed a little before starting to speak. 

“I’m Max Caulfield. I’m eighteen years old. I’m in Arcadia Bay… There was a storm… And I… I”

Her voice crumbled and finally broke with her last word. Her fists clenched over her lap, shaking as her nails went deeper in the skin of her palms.

“You’re safe now.” Said the woman who was with her. 

She reached out and grabbed Max’s shoulder, but the girl recoiled at the contact, her eyes wide open in fear. The woman sighed and left her hand fall at her side again.

“There is nothing to be scared of, dear.”

Max didn’t respond. She just stayed there, looking into nothingness, repeating mentally her last words.

_ “I’m Max Caulfield. I’m eighteen years old. I’m in Arcadia Bay. Everyone is dead. Not. Not everyone, but most of them are dead. They are dead and I killed them all. I killed you. I killed you…” _

Sighing in resignation, the women in white got up from her chair and stretched a little.

“I need to see others now” She said, looking at Max like she was evaluating if she could trust her enough to leave her on her own. She seemed to know it was a bad idea. “I’ll leave someone with you.”

Max just ignored her. She curled up in a ball over the hard folding bed she was sitting and just hugged her knees against her chest, her eyes fixed on the wall of the big tent she was in. The tears didn’t came as she thought they will.

She saw by the corner of her eye how the woman left the tent. A couple of seconds later, another woman working with the relief effort  entered and sat down on the same chair. She didn’t say anything.

 

_____________________________________________   
  
_ Drenched in cold water, hugging her knees as tight as she could, as she was trying not to collapse in milion pieces. Shattered like glass, destroyed like the town not far away from the Lighthouse in where she was hiding from the storm. _

_ She couldn’t do it. She couldn’t just go back and undo everything, even if she now was at the brink of collapse, even if she felt like she was about to have a mental breakdown in any second. She couldn’t sacrifice her best friend, the girl she loved with every little piece of her soul, even if it the cost to have her alive, breathing by her side, was too high. _

_ Chloe  was there, holding the exact same position for a couple of hours now, just looking at the other side of the circular room. Breathing, safe… Chloe was an emotional wreckage, a mess, shattered, broken and full of guilt and sadness. But she was alive, and that was the only thing Max cared for. If this was the price, if this awful feeling and guilt would chase her for the rest of her life, Max was more than eager to pay it. _

_ Even if that meant Chloe hated her for what she did. Max could live with that too. Not painless, of course, but she could.  _

_ Max could go on if she was alive, even if her best friend hated her for it. Max could. Right? _

_ The sound of the rain started to fade after what seemed an eternity. The wind eased its whisper around them and, finally, the storm passed and a deep and heavy silence filled the air. None of them moved for a while until it seemed real. The monstrous storm has come and gone for good. _

_ “We… we need to get to the town.” Said Chloe, getting up slowly. Max could see the dark bags under her blue eyes, puffy and bloodshot from the crying. “Maybe… maybe someone make it. We could…” _

_ Her raspy voice faded away with a frustrated sigh. Max heard her curse in a shaky whisper.  _ _ Chloe faced her and lent a hand to help her get up from the floor, looking anywhere but her face. She didn’t say anything else, she just walked outside grabbing Max’s hand with cold fingers. _

____________________________________________________________________   
  
Max woke up suddenly a couple of hours later, with a scream stuck in her throat. The cold sweat covered her forehead and the palm of her hands, clenched in fists. She was in the same exact position she was when she lied down.

The woman from FEMA wasn’t there anymore, but the tent wasn’t empty. Max recognized Chloe’s silhouette at the open door of the tent, dark in contrast with the orange glow of the sunset lighting the place. She was wearing a big coat, David’s no doubt, and her beanie was missing. A lighted cigarette was hanging between two fingers.

Max got up, with her heart still racing as she tried to shake out of her head the awful nightmare. The rustle sound of the rough sheets made Chloe turn around and her eyes bump into Max’s and she looked away as fast as she could, avoiding to hold her gaze.

“How… How’s Joyce?” Max asked, her voice shaky and weak. 

Chloe let her cigarette fall to the ground and crushed it with the heel of her boot. She sighed, turned around and sat next to Max on the bed, her head down as her elbows rested over her knees.

“Better now that she knows we’re alive.” She said. “Step-dou… damn. David is with her now.”

“Why you’re not?” Asked Max. She would understood Chloe wanted to be with her mother instead with the girl responsible for her injuries.

“I’m worried for you, Max.” Said Chloe, with a hint of exasperation, her eyes still fixed on the flor. ”I’m… hella worried to be honest. You are not the same after… after what happened at the cliff.”

Max shook her head. This wasn't the first time they had that conversation. And it always ended the same way.

“I did the right thing.” She said.

“I don't think so, Max. I mean, look at this shithole… mom is hurt, a lot of people are… gone. And look at you. You… You’re broken. Maybe you should have…”

“You are out of your mind if you think I’d be okay if I had let you die, Chloe.” Snapped Max.

Her fists clenched, her heart started to race again and her breath felt heavy, making her to struggle just to catch air.

_ A gunshot, Nathan crying as Chloe’s warm blood painted the white floor red. A blue butterfly flying away as Max regressed time. Pressure in her head, the world twisting around her, collapsing, breaking, the universe falling apart... _

“Max? Max can you hear me?”

Max blinked twice and looked up, just to find Chloe’s blue eyes filled with alarm and concern. Max felt like years had passed since she could look Chloe in the eye. The brunette shook her head and hugged her knees, placing her chin over them, trying to focus. For a moment she felt she was about to lose it. Maybe she had.

“I’m Max Caulfield. I’m eighteen years old. I’m in Arcadia Bay. I’m in Arcadia Bay and Chloe Price is here. Chloe… Price… is… here…”

A warm and familiar arm wrapped her as she started to cry again. 

 

______________________________________________________________________________   
  
_ Arcadia bay had become a ghost town. There was no sign of life anywhere. No movement, no sound, not even a survivor making a way through the wreckage. It was almost nightfall when the girls reached the main street and passed The Two Whales, or what was left of the diner. _

_ Max looked away the very moment the diner appeared in their line of sight. It seemed abandoned, like the rest of the town, and Max tried to blink and erase the image of the very same building blowing up in front of her.  _

_ The dark stains on the outside, the shattered glasses of the windows and the terrifying hole in the ceiling confirmed what Max already knew. The diner blowed up, because she wasn’t there to stop it. _

_ Part of her was hoping that this timeline was different, but at the end, it seemed to be like being stuck in and endless nightmare. _

_ Chloe parked the truck in front of the diner and run to it, leaving the driver’s door wide open. Max could hear her shout her mother’s name. That desperate sound ringed loudly in her ears, higher and higher. She didn’t knew when she covered them with both hands to drown it, but it was ringing in her head. Inside her, tearing her apart. _

_ “This is your fault” A voice whispered. Her own voice. “This is all your fault and you know it. You fucked everything up for your precious punk Chloe, like I said you would. You’re a murderer.” _

_ “Shut up.” Max growled, pressing her hands harder against her ears. _

_ “I’ll not. Because I’m you and you want to hear what I have to say, asshole.” _

_ “I don’t want to hear anything. I just…” _

_ “You did what I said you’d do. I tried to warn you, I tried to tell you she’s using you, screwing with you, but you don’t want to see it.” _

_ “Chloe’s not using me. Chloe is my best friend, she’d never do that…” _

_ “You know she would. You know she does. But you’re too proud or too naive to finally admit it, even to yourself. You are pathetic. You risked everything for her, even the integrity of the fucking universe. And what do you receive in exchange? A fucking cold shoulder. She’s even incapable to look you in the eye, you idiot.” _

_ Max shook her head, incapable of replying to her own cold and teasing voice. She wanted to scream, to drown it, to shut it, to hear only silence… _

_ “¡Max, I need help! ¡Max! ¡Come here, quickly!” _

_ She snapped her eyes open and looked at the diner. Chloe was coming back, almost running, with something in her arms. It seemed like a bloody bag of fur. _

_ “Are you gonna help me or not!?” She demanded. Max stepped out of the truck and approached her. _

_ Chloe had her puffy eyes red, and the mark of the tears that had been running down her cheeks recently. Max only recognized Pompidou when she was close enough to touch it. The dog was injured, it’s hair burned and a terrifying amount of blood was pouring from it’s injuries. _

_ “Oh my god.” Whispered the brunette as she guided Chloe to the back of the truck, where she left the dog, whining and crying, trying in vain to lick his wounds. _

_ Chloe went straight to the cab of her truck and came back quickly, with a small beaten up first aid kit. Silently, the girl opened it and started to clean the dog’s injuries with shaky hands, while Max stared at her and then at the diner, insure if she should tell Chloe about it. About how she knew the diner would blow up if she wasn’t there to stop it.  _

_ “You hurt Pompidou” Said her other self, coldly, her voice loudly enough to drown the dog's cry. “You killed Joyce, Warren, Frank and everyone at the diner. You’re a monster. You’re a selfish brat with a power you don’t understand. And you just played with it. Idiot.” _

_ “Earth calling to Max Caulfield?” _

_ She shook her head and came back to the present. Chloe was staring at her, alert and concern filled her blue eyes. _

_ “Yes?” Muttered the brunette, looking away. _

_ “Do… do you think my mom was here?” She asked, finishing with the last injury in Pompidou’s back. Her hands were shaky, but the dog seemed to be feeling better, because he stopped whining.  _

_ “I…” _

_ “Tell her. Tell her the truth. You know how she’s gonna react. She’ll swear and get angry, because that’s all she does.” Teased her the voice in her head. “Come on, tell her Joyce is dead and you knew it will happen…” _

_ Max swallowed audibly and the look on her face must have tipped her off, because Chloe’s expression muted from sad concern to fury in just a couple of seconds. _

_ “Max… what do you know?” _

_ “I…” _

_ “You... knew!  She was here and... You fucking knew and you didn’t tell me?!”  _

_ Chloe snapped, like Max knew she would. The girl punched the back of the truck with a clenched fist, boiling in anger. Pompidou growled, scared for the outburst. _

_ “I can’t believe it. You could… you could have told me, we could have warned her! We could have done something!” _

_ “Chloe, it was another timeline, I wasn’t…” _

_ “This timeline or not, it happened!” Chloe blowed up, fixing her eyes in Max’s. The tears rolling down her cheeks again in desperation. “You know what? Fuck this shit. I’m not leaving until I find her. You can do whatever the fuck you want.” _

_ “Chloe, wait!” _

_ The blue haired girl run to the diner again. Max ran off behind her. _

_ The diner was empty, no bodies. Aside from Frank. Or what was left of him. _

_ Chloe was the one who found him, and recoiled back to the street. She let herself fall to her knees and threw up in the pavement, shaking and sweating. Max let her be. She was afraid of coming closer to her, even if she wanted to. She just saw her best friend swear in the street, trying not to stain her wet clothes with vomit as she tried to avoid looking at the diner. She wanted to reach out, to touch her, to hug her, to tell her everything would be fine. But she knew it was a lie.  _

_ She could barely stand at that point, her mind overwhelmed by the guilt, by the memories and the heavy lift of her powers pushing her down in desperation. _

_ “Well, good job. Now Frank is just a bloody mass all over the floor. Congratulations” The other Max in her mind teased her. “And of course, Chloe’s angry with you. Because it’s all your fault. Ha, I may give her the right to be pissed at you this time. You deserved it, asshole.” _

_ “Stop it.” Whispered Max. She closed her eyes. _

_ “You don’t want me to stop. That’s why you’re listening. You don’t get it, don’t you? I’ll never leave your head, because you regret it. You regret what you did.” _

_ “No, I don’t!” _

_ “Yes, you do. You regret saving your precious punk Chloe, and now, you can’t fucking undo it!” _

_ “I don’t regret it. I don’t regret it. I don’t regret it…” _

_ “Max?! Max, what the fuck?!” _

_ She opened her eyes. She was on her knees, in the middle of the street, grabbing her head with both hands, whispering loudly. Tears were rolling down her cheeks and her teeths were clenched tight.  _

_ She saw how Chloe knelt before her and took her arms, trying to undo her tense posture. Max’s body refused, while she kept whispering. _

_ “Just look at me. Look at me, okay?” Said Chloe, trying to stop the girl from shaking. She was pale as death. “You can’t collapse now, Max. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry! Please, talk to me. Say something.” _

_ “I’m… I’m okay…” _

_ “Yeah, sure. Totally fine.” Snapped Chloe. Then hugged her, tight. It didn’t matter if they were uncomfortable, kneeling on the ground, the smell of pooke and a disaster around them, their clothes still wet. Max could feel like all her shattered pieces glued together. For a brief second, she felt good. _

_ “I don’t regret it.” She thought, hoping her words reached out her other self inside her mind. “I don’t regret it.” _

_ They spent a couple of minutes like that, their bodies pressed together as it was the only way to have a hold to reality. To this reality. To this awful and painful reality… _

_ “Chloe?! Chloe, is that you?” _

_ Both girls pulled away and looked street down, looking for the owner of that familiar voice. _

_ David Madsen, along with a couple of officers and members of the national guard appeared all of the sudden, lightning the now darker environment with flashlights.  _

_ “Holy shit…” Muttered Chloe, as she stand up and helped the shaky and weak Max to do the same. _

 

______________________________________________________________________________

 

Max’s head was resting in Chloe’s lap while the blue haired girl caressed her hair with shaky fingers. Outside, it was night. The tent was lighted by a small lamp that a guy from the national guard lend Chloe a while ago.

The camp was silent. Chloe told Max that she wandered around for a while. She tried to figure out how bad it was, even if she didn’t wanted to know, really. She felt responsible for what happened and seeing all those people hurt and the long list of casualties and missing people was just a punch to the gut after another.

Joyce was alive at least, and David too. She was injured in the explosion that took place at the Two Whales. And David… David was at the dark room at the time.

Warren made it too, he was the one who helped Joyce to get out of there when things got ugly. Frank saved them all. He noticed that something was off and was him the one who shout “get down!”, preventing the rest of the refugees to be reached by the explosion.

Max would never be able to erase the mental image of Frank blowing up in pieces.

As far as she knew, Frank was only one in the long list of casualties FEMA and the national guard put up. He, along with Alyssa, Evan, Luke, Justin, officer Berry and many others, now just names written down in a casualties report.

The missing person list was more scary, if possible. Almost three hundreds of people whose location and status were unknown. A chill went down Max’s spine when Chloe told her Nathan was one of them. Max already knew he was dead, buried in god knows where. They probably’d never found his body, as Jefferson planned.

Max shivered at the memory of the man. She never was captured in this reality. She never was in the Dark Room. But the memories of the other timelines she experienced didn’t fade away as she expected. Even if she was right there, curled in a bed in a stinky tent with Chloe, her mind was still there, in the dark, praying to not feel the sharp sting of the needle in her neck, praying not to hear that soft voice in her ears, telling her she was perfect, that she was the chosen one. Telling her she was going to die that night.

_ “I knew you were special the moment I saw your first… selfie…” _

Chloe felt Max’ body tense as she curled up again into a ball and hugged her knees tight, breathing erratically as another panic attack hit her. Not even Chloe’s presence could scare them away. She learned that the hard way. Chloe just could stay there with Max, trying to snap her out of the trap of her own mind, often in vain. 

“I’m… Maxine Caulfield… I’m in Arcadia Bay… Chloe…”

The taller girl caressed her friend’s tense shoulders gently as she repeated the only words she could.

“I’m here, Max. I’ll always be here. No matter what. ”

Max forced herself to continue, because those words were her only anchor to reality.

“... Price… Chloe Price is… here. Chloe Price is… here.”


	2. Sorry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UPDATE: Thanks to GrumpyCat42, I managed to correct a lot of mistakes this chapter had. I'll work harder to make sure this won't happen again.
> 
> Thanks for reading!

The camp was quiet. It was so early when Chloe woke up that the sun hadn’t risen yet. She sat down, her back hurting and her hands itchy, anxious and restless. She looked at the other folding bed beside her, occupied by a slim figure, breathing fast and uneasy. A soft whimper escaped her.

Chloe got up, put her boots on and approached the other bed, not sure how to act. She sat down near the edge and looked at the younger girl. Max was sleeping, but her eyebrows were furrowed, her jaw tense and she was grabbing the blankets with both hands like they were a lifeline. Another whimper escaped through her teeth, while a single drop of sweat rolled down her forehead.

Chloe wiped it away with her thumb. She looked at Max for a while, caressing her hair softly. The gesture seemed to relax her a little, so she continued, even if she felt odd doing it.

Chloe felt like these were the only moments in which she could look at Max without feeling bad about it. The little wrinkles between her eyebrows, the contrast between her multitude of freckles and her pale skin, the dark bags under her closed eyes, her parted lips, corners down.

She didn’t know what to think, what to feel. She was alive because of Max. Because she refused to go back in time and let her die. But the rest of the town, all those dead and missing persons… it was because of her too.

Chloe should have tried harder. She should have forced Max to go back, to let things play out as they were supposed to. But even if she was ready to die, even if she accepted her fate… part of her couldn’t deal with it. Part of her felt relieved that Max destroyed that photo in front of her and let the storm swallow it. And she hated herself for it too.

She knew Max had taken all the blame and that it was consuming, breaking her like she was made of thin glass. Chloe wasn’t angry at her. She knew if she had the choice, she’d have done the very same thing. But Max was a better person than her. Max Caulfield deserved to be alive and well and happy because she was good, kind, generous, beautiful...

Chloe was the one who was selfish. She was the trouble girl, the immature, the irresponsible, the girl who was supposed to be dead. She was the one who deserved to be dead, not half of the town she grew up in.

Max was supposed to make the right decision. She had the power to fix it, to accept it and move on… but she didn’t. She chose to save Chloe and the blue haired girl didn’t understand why. She probably never would.  
Chloe sighed and got up from the bed, incapable of looking at Max's tormented face any longer. She took David’s coat from the chair and left the tent slowly, grabbing the beaten up cigarette box she managed to save from the rain.

She wandered around the quiet refugee camp, trying not to think she was the cause for all these people being there, in Blackwell’s football field, stuck in stinky tents and eating canned food from the government because most of them didn’t have a home to go back to.

She sat down on a fallen tree and lighted a cigarette. She focused on making smoke rings for a while, ignoring the chill running down her spine every time the soft and cold breeze of dawn hit her.

She almost jump off her seat when something wet touched her hand. Pompidou had followed her and he was pushing his cold nose into her hand, demanding affection. The poor animal was beaten up, half ripped off bandages and awful scars all over his furry body. But he seemed to feel good enough to wander around camp.

 _“At least i could help someone”_ Thought Chloe bitterly, rubbing behind the dog’s ears.

 

____________________________________________________________________________  
  
_David was speechless. He tried to run to the two girls, limping painfully. A bandage stained with blood covered his head and his right eye. The remaining visible eye was full of tears held back, puffy and reddish._

_He stopped dead just infront of Chloe. Both looked at each other, unsure how to act. David seemed relieved and Chloe was too, in a way. At least someone from the town was still alive.. She just hoped…_

_“Where is she?” Demanded Chloe, the tears in her eyes finally rolling down her cheeks. Her voice was almost a beg. “David, where is my mom?”_

_“She’s okay. She’s alive.” Said the man, emotion filling his low voice._

_He almost recoiled in surprise when Chloe made a step forward and actually hugged him. He just stayed there, still, looking at the young girl burying her face in his chest, shaken by desperate sobs. He gave her a couple of clumsy pats on her back, not sure if an actual hug would be too much._

_It didn’t last long. Chloe pulled away awkwardly and fixed her attention to Max’s pale face. She hugged her too. Chloe could almost feel some of the weight on Max’s shoulders disappear with the good news._

_“C’mon.” Said David. “Let’s head back. FEMA and the National Guard put up a survivor’s camp just outside Blackwell. They will continue without me. Max, are you alright?”_

_The brunette didn’t answer. She just tightened her grip to Chloe’s jacket._

_“Let’s go, Max.” She said. “Are you here with me?”_

_“Yeah… Yeah, I am.” The younger girl shook her head, as if she was trying to shake off whatever was in her mind, reluctantly pulling away from Chloe. “Mr. Madsen… Joyce was the only one…?”_

_“No.” Said David, guiding them to Chloe’s truck. Her eyes never leaving Chloe’s face. “A young boy from Blackwell helped her… the Diner was blown up when I got here last night. A couple of others were holed up inside, too. I believe… Frank Bowes was the only one who didn’t make it.”_

_Chloe heard Max sigh. She wasn’t sure if it was a sigh of relief or a sigh of helplessness._

_“Who… who else was here, Max?” Asked Chloe in a whisper, when she thought David wasn’t paying attention._

_“Warren.” She said, spark of hope appearing in her eyes. Chloe felt her gut twist. “And people I usually saw around the diner. It's just ... i don't know their names. I’m… I’m so sorry about Frank.”_

_“Yeah… me too.” Said Chloe._

_Max got in the cab of the truck and David sat in the back. Chloe looked over her shoulder for a moment before opening the door of the truck and letting Pompidou in._

_“I’ll look after your little buddy, Frank. It’s… it’s the least I can do.”_

 

______________________________________________________________________________

The landscape looked ravaged. Fallen trees, broken posts all over the place, cars upside down, houses absolutely destroyed, their ceilings gone or caved in, a lot of homeless, people hurt, some of them with crutches, arms, legs and heads in bloody bandages… Not to mention the FEMA lists displayed nearby, growing longer and longer… Not even in the worst apocalyptic movies she had seen had exhibited such destruction and hopelessness.

A tall figure, wearing a stained bandage on the head, sat down next to her on the tree, at a safe distance. Chloe sighed and extinguished the cigarette on the floor.

“How… how is she?” She asked harshly, crossing her arms over the chest, refusing to look at anything besides the rest of the smoke still floating in the air.

“She’s… better now.” Answered David. “She slept well all night.”

“I bet you didn’t.”

David sighed deeply.

“I never sleep well, Chloe. You know that. And after this?”

“I know the feeling, dude.”

An awkward silence ensued. Tension filled the air. Chloe couldn't smoothen the sharp edge of her voice. Even after all that happened, she went back to being passive-aggressive every single time David was near her.

 _“I need to stop this bullshit.”_ She thought. _“You were ready to die for this guy, even if he’s a total ass and a freaking paranoiac.”_

“How’s Max?” Asked David, as he was trying to fill the silence with something. With anything.

Chloe shook her head.

“Bad.” She said weakly. She could feel the lump in her throat tense and the held-back tears burning in her eyes. She knew she couldn’t tell the truth, but if there was a slim chance someone could help Max in any way… “I’m worried.”

“Chloe… I know this will sound awful and this is hardly the time but… the other night, Max seemed to know a big deal about… about that sick bastard. She told you something?” David’s voice shook with anger. “Did… did he…?”

Now, that was indeed a question. Max just said he hurt her in another timeline, but she wasn’t exactly specific. After Max took her away from the End of the World Party, she was “replaced” by the Max from that reality, like she was just on auto-pilot. For a while, she didn’t remember anything at all about Jefferson and the Dark Room, like it never happened. So, After that, she never told her. But she heard Max say his name more than once in her restless sleep.

“I don’t know.” She answered after a couple of seconds in silence.

She heard David take a sharp breath.

“Well… shit.”

“Yeah… ”

 _“I’m so sorry that sick bastard is dead.”_ She thought with a deep hate growing in her chest. _“He hurt her, i don't know how badly… And after what he did to Kate? To… Rachel? He deserved way worse than being crushed by a fucking car in a storm._ “I’ll… I’ll go back.” Said David, getting up. “Just… come by when you can. Joyce’d… like to see you.”

“The doctors said anything after I left yesterday?”

 

___________________________________________________________________________  
_  
_ _Chloe entered the Blackwell gym and looked around frenetically. The place was crowded, a lot of people were lying on strechers lined along the wall opposite the entrance, being assisted by doctors and nurses from the relief effort._

_She recognized some faces among the crowd. She knew some, had even talked to those, like Trevor, who was sitting on a chair, holding a girl’s hand. She believed the girl was one of Blackwell’s cheerleaders but she wasn’t entirely sure._

_A lot of people she knew by sight, just because Arcadia was her home since she was born. Truckers, everyday customers from the Two Whales or simply  people she recognized from the street. Arcadia Bay wasn’t exactly big, one usually tended to know most of the inhabitants faces._

_She found Joyce in the last stretch, near the emergency exit. Chloe almost ran to her, ignoring the warnings of the people around, and wrapped Joyce in her arms and finally lost all control over her tears._

_“Chloe?! Chloe, oh good lord…”_

_Joyce returned the hug with only one arm, so tight it almost hurt._

_“I’m sorry mom! I’m so fucking sorry!” Chloe sobbed uncontrollably, wetting Joyce’s shirt._

_“It’s okay, honey. It’s okay. I’m okay.”_

_“I’m sorry. This is… this is my fault I’m so, so sorry.”_

_“Why do you say that, dear? You can’t control the weather, this had nothing to do with you.”_

_Joyce caressed her back softly, her voice broken as she started to cry too._

_“I should have known you were at the diner, I… I should… I should have…”_

_“Shh, honey. It’s okay. I was so worried about y’all… Where is Max? Is she alright?”_

_Chloe pulled back and looked at her mother’s weary face with concern. She didn’t answer right away and Joyce’s relief evaporated._

_“Honey? Where is Max?”_

_“She’s outside.” Said Chloe with a sigh. “She’s… not doing so well, mom.”_

_“Is she hurt? What happened?”_

_Chloe sighed again and looked around. She couldn’t help it, she felt responsible for every injury her eyes spotted._

_“We were at the lighthouse, the storm missed us completely.” Said Chloe. “She’s dealing with… other stuff.”_

_“I see…” Said Joyce, worried and thoughtful. “Go be with her. I’ll be alright.”_

_“But, mom…”_

_“I know, I know.” Joyce caressed Chloe’s face with her healthy arm and wiped away a tear with her thumb. “I’ll be just fine here, really. I’m sure she needs you.”_

_“I’m… not so certain.”_

_“Honey, I saw the way she looks at ya.” Said Joyce with a tiny smile on her face. Even in that awful situation, her mother was strong enough to smile. She wondered how she did it. “Believe me, I know. At least she has you now. C’mon. I’m not going anywhere for now.”_

 

___________________________________________________________________________

 

“She’s better.” Said David, bringing Chloe back to the present. He sounded relieved. Kind of. “The doctor said the arm is broken, but… that’s the worst part of it really. The burns are just superficial. She was lucky.”

“Luckier than Frank, at least.” Said Chloe with a bitter tone. David looked at her with apprehension.  “I’m sorry. I… I try not to think about it.”

“I… can imagine.” He muttered. “I’ll get going, just… don’t get in any trouble. You should…”

David interrupted himself and looked away, pursing his lips. Chloe looked at him questioningly. She hadn’t the time or energy to argue about the step-father stuff.

“I’m sorry.” Muttered David, awkwardly. “You know where we are if you need anything.”

“Yeah…”

Uncomfortable silence again. David turned and left her alone with Pompidou, dragging his feet. Chloe turned around and looked at the man as he walked away, his shoulders and head down, tired as hell and with that ugly and bloody bandage over his head. She needed a couple of seconds to realize she felt a little bad for him. At least a little was better than nothing at all.

“David” She called.

The man looked over his shoulder, his dark eyes fixed on her face, confused, and whatever words Chloe had thought to say, they got lost in her throat. She looked away.

“Thanks for the coat.”

 

Chloe came back to the tent a while later, hoping Max was still sleeping. She’d feel awful if the younger girl woke up from a nightmare and she wasn’t there to calm her down. Not that she deserved to be there to do so, considering she and her multiple deaths during the past few days were in part responsible for those nightmares. Not that she deserved Max’s attention in any way after all that happen. That thought made feel uneasy and confused as hell.

The brunette was sleeping, to Chloe’s relief. Her bed was a mess though, and she was clearly fighting her inner demons, shaking and grabbing the sheets desperately. Her face was drenched in cold sweat.

“No…” She said. A lonely tear escaped her eyes. “I can’t… I won’t…”

Chloe sat down on the bed and shook Max a little, trying to wake her. The girl responded immediately to the contact, and snapped her eyes open. She looked around frenetically, with a deep fear in her gaze that Chloe had seen before. The same look she gave her before the Vortex Club Party. Alarmed, scared and something else she couldn’t identify. It wasn’t the look of a young girl. It was the look of someone far more old and… tired.

“Chloe... “ She muttered and grabbed her coat tight, swallowing soundly. She looked at the blue haired girl like she was afraid she’d disappear in front of her.

“I’m here.” Answered Chloe, looking away.

She felt like crap, but she couldn’t look her in the eye for more than a couple of seconds. She felt unworthy and ashamed, and she knew Max noticed the distance.

She felt Max’s cold hand cupping her cheek and softly pushing at it, forcing Chloe to look at her. Chloe fixed her gaze on some point just above Max’s head, her jaw tense. She hated how Max’s touch made her skin burn, and the awkward feeling in her gut. She She had never been so confused in her entire life.

“What are you thinking?” Asked Max, her eyes fixed on Chloe's, even if the taller girl wasn’t looking at them.

Chloe’s neutral expression tensed.

 

_When she came back, Max was on her knees in the middle of the street, pushing her shaky hands against her ears._

_“Max?! Max, what the fuck?!”_

_Chloe knelt before her and tried to hold her, but the girl recoiled in fear. Her mouth was moving, and Chloe needed a couple of seconds to understand that she was whispering._

_“I don’t regret it. I don’t regret it. I don’t regret it.”_

_She felt like the world around her started to collapse, like it hadn't collapsed already with the storm. She should be dead… and Max knew it. Was she trying to convince herself she did the right thing?  Did she regret it that badly?_

_She never imagined she would want to be dead. At least not as badly as that moment._

 

“Chloe?” Insisted Max when she didn’t answer.

Chloe forced herself to look Max in the eye. It was hard and unconfortable, the girl's gaze burning her like fire.

“I need you to be honest with me.” Said Chloe, with a sharp edge to her voice, even if it wasn’t more than a whisper. “Why? Why did you chose this instead of… letting me go? I need to know, because it’s driving me fucking insane.”

Max blinked a couple of times, while Chloe’s words sank in. Her expression went from half asleep and afraid to incredulous and… hurt?

“Chloe, I told you I won’t trade you. Didn’t I?” Said Max, frowning. “You’re my number one priority now. I didn’t… I didn't save you a thousand times just to undo everything at the end.”

“Max, did you see where we are now?” Chloe asked, her voice trembling. “It’s a fucking mess out there. A lot of people is gone. It’s my fault, I just know it. I’m not worth it.”

Max shook her head furiously and sat on the bed suddenly. She looked at Chloe with an intensity that made the punk look away. She had never seen that determined expression on Max’s face.

“I know it’s a mess out there. I know lot of people are dead and… and missing and… I destroyed everything.” Max hands started to shake again. She swallowed audibly, fighting another panic attack, trying not to think about everything that had happened. She continued, her voice weakening as the seconds passed.

“This is my fault, not yours. Don’t you dare blame yourself for this. It was my decision to make and I chose. This is on my head.”

“But…”

“Stop.” Said Max abruptly, resting a hand on Chloe’s shoulder and squeezing it. “I told you, I did the right thing. I don’t regret it. Even if that means you hate me for what i have done. Even if this is driving me insane too. You’re alive and that’s all that matters to me.”

For a few moments, they looked at each other in silence. Max’s anger and fear were visible, but Chloe seemed as confused as before, trying to decipher something inside her head. Some of Max’s words were floating around in her mind without making any sense to her.

_“She’s so… strong. Even with all the shit we went through… the shit I don’t know about, she just looks at me like that and… goddamnit.”_

“I don’t hate you, Max.” Said Chloe softly, her voice broken. “You… what you did… There is no way in hell I could hate you for that. But I… I’m not worth all of this. You’re so… fucking broken right now and everything around us is hell and...”

“I made my choice.” Said Max plainly. “I destroyed the photo, there is no turning back now. I’ll not rewind again. Ever. It’s over.”

Chloe looked at her again after a while, still thinking through her words. She stumbled over a couple of beautiful and determined blue eyes, with that weary gaze… She was awfully aware of Max’s presence just a couple of inches away from her. The warmth emanating from her body, the intensity of her eyes, the way she breathed a little faster than normal, the way the hand she still had against her cheek was cold and shaky, how her pink lips, slightly parted, moved subtly with every breath...

Max closed the gap between them and her lips touched Chloe’s. They were soft and warm as she had imagined just a couple of seconds ago. Her chest felt lighter for a moment and a curious warm feeling filled her from head to toes. If she could describe what her insides felt like at that moment, she would said they were full of butterflies. It just felt… right. Somehow.

She didn’t know what she had missed when she stepped back during that stupid dare in her room a couple of days back. She supposed this was the motive she even thought about the dare, trying to test the waters, trying to sort out her feelings for Max and Rachel… and it ended up being more confusing than before.

As soon as it started, it ended. Max pulled back and looked away, embarrassed. A soft blush invaded her cheeks. Chloe blinked twice, still surprised.

“I’m sorry.” Muttered Max.

Chloe grabbed her chin softly and lifted her head slowly, looking her right in the eyes. The glow, that thing Chloe couldn’t identify before, was there. Somehow she deciphered it and whatever confusion she felt over the past week just vanished.. This time, was Chloe the one pressing her lips against Max’s.

“Don’t be sorry about this.” Said Chloe, pulling away softly. “Please.”

“Never”


	3. Insane

Chloe went to visit Joyce that afternoon and this time Max came along. The brunette felt a little better when she saw the woman was indeed fine, with a smile on her face, even if she seemed to be tired as hell.

Joyce hugged her like she was her own daughter and told her how relieved she was to see her alive and well. Technically speaking.

She told them what happened at the diner, and it was as awful as Max imagined when they saw the building. Joyce avoided speaking about what happened to Frank, maybe to spare them the bloody details. Chloe didn’t say anything, either because she couldn’t or because she didn’t want to tell her mother they saw what actually happened to the dealer.

While they talked, Max spaced out a little bit, looking around the gym. She recognized a lot of her own classmates and people from around town. One of the truckers she saved in the other timeline had made it. She spotted Trevor and Dana, together of course, and she could swear she saw Daniel DaCosta walking around the camp too.

 _“Look at all this injured people, dipshit.”_ The voice in her head said. _“Look at all the pain your decision caused… And don’t let me start with all the people who died…”_

 

_She could kind of hear the wind blowing around them, the screams of the inhabitants of Arcadia trying to take refuge from the end of the world… Evan crushed by a sign, Alyssa crying for help in a collapsed building, Joyce, Warren and the others blowing up…_

 

_Run. Run as fast as you can. You need to run, get out, escape, now. Now. Now. Now._

 

“Shut up” Muttered Max through her clenched teeth.

That brought Chloe and Joyce’s attention to her, interrupting their conversation.

“You okay, Max?” Joyce asked, worried.

The brunette shook her head.

_Run, get out. Now. Now. Escape. Fast. Now._

“Yeah, sorry. I… I need some air. Excuse me.”

“Max, wait…”

“It’s okay, Chlo.” She said brusquely, making the other girl stop half way to stand up. “I’m fine, seriously.”

 _“Ha, Max Caulfield the professional liar.”_ The voice in her head mocked her. _“Are you gonna tell her you hear voices? That’s the opposite of being fine, you know?”_

 _“Could you **please** just shut the fuck up?”  _ Max thought.

She had to make an effort to not say it out loud. It was bad enough that either Chloe or the doctors wanted her to be alone for more than a couple of minutes. If she started to shout in the middle of the camp it would certainly not help her case.

She walked around camp for a while, looking at the survivors and searching for familiar faces. She spotted Courtney and Taylor together, talking with other people Max only knew by sight. Both girls even waved at her.

She also saw Logan not far away, carrying stuff he salvaged from somewhere and she crossed paths with David, who was helping as many people as he could, even with her head still bandaged.

She stopped at the entrance of the camp and sat down near the fence the National Guard had put up. Blackwell was uphill, so she could see part of the town at the distance, near the shore. As always, the lighthouse was the center of the scene, while the sun started to slowly go down in the horizon.

 _“Admiring the view, murderer?”_ The voice asked.

Max sighed, but she didn’t respond. She just looked at the beach, now only a pile of rubble and sand, interrupted by an occasional dead whale. A couple of tears rolled down her cheeks. She had destroyed her hometown and part of her childhood in just a couple of hours. It seemed so surreal…

Someone approached her and sat down at her side with a low growl of pain.

“It’s like a movie, don’t you think?”  Warren asked. His voice lacked its usual enthusiasm.

“More like a nightmare.” Max said. She felt the lump in her throat intensify when she finally looked at him.

Warren had an arm in a sling, and a bloody bandage covering his neck and half of his face. His hair was short, shaved almost to the roots.

 _“Damn, he’s… he looks really bad…”_ Max thought. The other voice responded almost immediately.

_“It’s not necessary to say it’s your fault, right?”_

“Don’t give me that look.” He said, smiling painfully. “I’m a superhero now, didn’t you know?”

“Joyce told me you got her out of the diner” Said Max plainly, looking again at the horizon.

“Yeah, it was… Not exactly like a movie. Guess my superhero expertise couldn’t help me there.”

“At least you saved someone.” Max said.

“Yeah, because you killed the rest, didn’t you?”

“You saved Kate, Max. That was really amazing.” Warren said. “You really seemed like a superhero that day, acclaimed and everything. I barely got out in one piece from that hellhole.”

“Have you heard something about Kate?” Max asked. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to know or not. “My phone has been dead for the last two days.”

“Yeah, she texted me.” Warren said, relieved. “She was discharged from the hospital and went home, somewhere up north. So, yeah… She’s worried to death but okay as far as I know.”

 _“At least you didn’t kill Kate. Man, that would have been awful, wouldn’t it? It doesn’t matter if you killed thousands if at least some of your so-called friends survived. You’re such a selfish bitch, I can’t believe I’m sharing our mind with you.”_ The voice in her mind was even colder than before.

“Have you seen… anybody else?”

“Well, I’ve seen Victoria around… not that we talked much… Stella and Brooke are here too, somewhere. I didn’t found Alyssa or Justin though… and I have to say I’m incapable of looking at the reports to… you know… Confirm my fears.”

Max sighed with resignation.

“That makes both of us.”

“I heard about Mark Jefferson, though.” Warren changed his uncomfortable position in the floor, moving his injured leg with his healthy arm, with the pain reflected in his factions. “Nasty business if you ask me.”

_Dark, cold, the sound of a camera taking shot after shot. The smell of antiseptic and plastic drowning her and the white flash blinding her._

_It stopped. The sound of steps around her as the man looked for the perfect angle. She fought the restraints, in vain. Jefferson got furious. He yelled and cursed, out of control._

_“You need to be framed my way! You fucking bitch!”_

_“Why? Why are you doing this?” She begged. ”Please… no…”_

 

_Run. Escape. Get up and run. You need to get out. Now. Now. NOW._

 

 _“That didn’t happen in this timeline.”_ She thought, trying to come back to reality. _“That didn’t happen. I’ve never been there. I’ve never been there. I… I’m Max Caulfield. I’m in Arcadia Bay. I’ve never been in the Dark Room.”_

_“You’re lying.” The other Max said._

 

“He’s… He’s a hella insane motherfucker.” Max growled, hugging her knees and trying to control her thoughts in vain. It was almost like being there again, like she could actually feel the restrains on her wrists and ankles and the sharp sting on her neck.

 

“Wow, I see some of your punk... friend’s attitude rubbed off on you.” Said Warren, a little surprised from the outburst.

 _“I believe your punk friend’s selfishness came with the combo too. Don’t you think?”_ The voice in her head didn’t miss an opportunity to tease her.

“Maybe.” She said, trying to ignore it. “At least he can’t hurt anybody else now.”

Something in her tone must have caught Warren’s attention, because he looked at her frowning a little, worry painted all over his face.

“You okay?”

 

_Run. Get out. You’re perfect. I could frame you in a dark corner, in a moment of desperation. My way. God, those eyes…_

 

Max blinked and shook her head, trying in vain to drown Jefferson’s voice. She was losing it. For a second she thought she would open her eyes and find herself again, looking at the psycho who… who what? She didn’t even remember if he did… something to her. Ew. Ew. EW.

 

_Run, you need to get out of there, Max. Now, now._

 

“Not really. I… I just need to be alone for a moment, Warren. I’m… sorry.”

“I get it. This could be… hard to digest, I suppose.”

Max had to help him get up from the grass, since he wasn’t very stable with his injured leg. He grabbed Max by the shoulder and looked at her intensively with his uncovered eye when the girl recoiled at the contact.

_“No, no, not again…”._

“Just yell if you need anything. Okay?” Say Warren. “I’m here.”

_“Control yourself, damn it.”_

“Thanks, Warren. You… Just take care of yourself.” Max said weakly.

“Yeah, I know, I look like shit. But I’ll be fine.”

The guy walked away, or limped away to be more precise and left her alone, but not for long. She could see Chloe’s blue hair as she approached her through the camp and cross paths with Warren. He waved at her with little enthusiasm, a wave she didn’t return.  
Max sighed.

_"Better with Chloe than alone here waiting for another stupid panic attack to hit me, right?"_

“I’ve looking for you for like… hours.” She complained, standing up in front of Max.

“I was out only half an hour maybe.” Max said, forcing a smile. She didn’t want to worry Chloe again with her… mental instability. “Did you miss me much?”

“Hella.” She said, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. Max felt a little better with that familiar touch. “It’s… stupid, but… I don’t like when you’re out of sight, it gives me the creeps. You, ehm… Are you okay? What did Waldo want with you?”

“Warren.”  Max emphasized.  

_“You can do it. Just… act. Everything is fine. You’re fine. Chloe’s fine… I’m Max Caulfield… I’m in...”_

“He was just checking in, don’t worry. I believe he took your text message seriously the other day.” Max said, forcing a little smile. Chloe couldn’t repress a snort. “I’m fine, just… tired.”

_“And guilty and, as your lovely… friend... would say, fucking insane in the brain…”_

“He better stay in line.” Chloe said bitterly and Max rolled her eyes. “Listen, I… I was thinking we could… go check on my house.”  She pursed her lips. “Maybe we could… I don’t know, grab some stuff. A change of clothes would be nice.”

She looked at her filthy t-shirt stained with mud, blood and other unrecognizable substances.

“Yeah, probably…”

Chloe seemed a bit off and Max noticed it. She was close but her eyes were elsewhere, absent. Exactly the same gaze she had that morning, before they kissed.

“What is it?” Max asked. Her gut twisted a little. “I know that look, Chlo…”

“Yeah, well… David told me the FEMA guys are starting to contact the relatives of some survivors, mostly from Blackwell students. And since there is no signal and your phone is a no go...” She said awkwardly. “I… I think you should ask them to call your folks. I mean, this whole issue with the tornado thing must be all around the media right now… They are probably worried to d… hella worried, I mean.”

“I should but… I don’t think I’m ready to face them yet.” Max said.

The perspective to have her parents all over her, like she was just another victim made her feel sick. She didn’t deserve that kind of treatment from anyone, or that’s what she thought. Chloe was all over her, yeah but it was different. Right? Nobody knew what they lived through; nobody could know the secret they share. Much less understand it.

“Dude…”

“I know, Chlo. I know.” Max sighed. “Let’s just go to your place for now. I’ll… think about this in the meantime.”

“Okay. Let’s roll then.”

 

Max pressed her forehead against the truck’s window, looking at the wreckage at the side of the road as they passed by. Some of the buildings were still standing, and the further they went from the shore, the storm seemed to had lost its grip, sparing some houses here and there. She felt some kind of twisted relief, hoping that somehow the town could be rebuilt sooner rather than later.

She caressed Pompidou’s head, distracted. The dog followed Chloe everywhere now and the girl seemed to be fond of him, and so was Max. She couldn’t help to feel sorry about the fact she was, indirectly, his owner’s killer.

Chloe’s neighborhood was one of the less damaged. Her house was still standing at least, ignoring the fact that someone’s water tank had collided with the roof and Joyce’s room was now completely caved in.

Chloe parked the truck over the sidewalk and killed off the engine.

“Home shit home” She said with a sigh.

Both girls and the dog stepped out the truck. Pompidou sniffed around for a while, walking slowly and painfully, while Chloe tried to open the door with her keys. The lock seemed to be busted, because it wouldn't budge.

Chloe guided Max over the fence and into the backyard. It seemed so different now, full of garbage and rubble… the swing William made was missing and Bongo’s tomb was covered by leaves and broken wood.

The slide door was shattered and its glass was all over the floor inside the house. Chloe stepped in carefully to not get hurt and guided Max inside. She never let go of her hand, and Max felt Chloe’s warm grip comforting.

Even if the sun was still up in the sky, the whole house seemed darker, colder. There was no sight of the usual comforting and familiar warm or the scent of Joyce’s pancakes. It felt like a different house for Max, who unconsciously went to the fireplace and glided her fingers across the butterfly drawn there…

Wait a minute. Butterfly… drawn there?

_“This… it can’t be…”_

_“I have to be sure... “Thought thirteen-year-old Max and knelt right before the fireplace._

_She drew a single butterfly in one of the bricks with one of the markers she borrowed from the table._

_“This should work, I can’t lose track of realities. I… I need to be sure.”_

“Max? Hey…”

Max came back to the present and shook her head furiously, trying to clear her mind. She touched the brick again with her shaky fingers. There was no sign from the drawing. It just wasn’t there.

 _“It’s… I’m confusing realities? That’s all these flashes I’m having?”_ She thought, afraid and insecure. _“I could swear the drawing was here and… I didn’t rewind… am I losing it?”_

 _“You’re asking that? Really?”_ Her own voice responded inside of her mind. _“You’re talking to yourself right now, you idiot. Why merging realities in your head is worse than multiple personality disorder?”_

Chloe was looking at her, her eyebrows frowned and her gaze worried.

“You’re… spacing out again.”

“Yeah, sorry.” She apologized, looking at the rest of the living room. “Just… I have a lot in my mind right now.”

_“Of course you’ll play hero now. You’re fine, of course, super Max. You’re not hearing voices at all.”_

“I get it.” Chloe said. She grabbed her hand again and forced a tiny smile. “C’mon. Let’s head upstairs.”

Both girls needed to help each other to sort the stairs. Part of the ceiling had collapsed over them when half of the structure fell down. They could see the clear sky through the hole above their heads.

Curiously, Chloe’s room was almost intact. The windows were broken of course, and the American flag was on the floor, full of tiny little holes, but besides that, the room seemed exactly like when they left it only two days ago. It felt like a different world.

“Watch where you step” Warned Chloe, walking on her tiptoes around the room. “Grab the backpack from the wardrobe, I… just remembered something.”

She complied quietly while the punk searched for something in her desk.

Max opened the door, took the bag and started to fill it with Chloe’s clothes. There were Rachel’s too and after a moment of hesitation, she packed it anyway.

 _“It’s not like a dead girl would need her clothes, right?”_ The voice in her head teased her. _“Or maybe you expect to be more like Rachel, so Chloe likes you more. Damn, you are so pathetic.”_

_“Shut up.”_

_“It doesn’t matter anyway. She owes you now. Maybe you can use that to your advantage, force her to stick around you, hug you, kiss you.... You’ll be the fucking consolation prize, now that Rachel is dead. Chloe owes you and she knows it. Or you thought she suddenly discovered her love for you and kissed you like in a stupid movie?”_

Max shut her eyes and clenched her fists, trying to drown the other voice with her own.

_“Shut. Up. I’m not like that. That’s not what I think.”_

_“Oh, yeah. She totally fell for you, right? Did she say it? Of course, she didn’t say it. How convenient.”_

_When Max opened her eyes, there was no trace of Chloe’s room. She was again in the Two Whales, sitting on a table. The other Max from her nightmare was there too, staring at her with her cold and dark eyes._

_“You used your powers to manipulate everything and everyone. Why wouldn’t you manipulate your lovely punk princess? You killed thousands for her, what’s the problem?_

_“Are you nuts?! I… I tried to use my powers for good.”_

_“And you unraveled a fucking E6 tornado over your hometown. And you could just go back and fix it, but you let it happen. So much for good intentions… “_

_“I don’t want to listen to you! Why you don’t just leave me alone! I have enough knowing I’m responsible for this without you in my head. Get out!”_

_“Sadly, you’ll have to learn to live with me. I am you. And you’re listening to yourself because you want to.”_

_“Stop it. Please…”_

“Max? Max, what’s wrong?

Max snapped her eyes open and the first thing she saw was Chloe’s concerned look. Again. The punk was grabbing her by the arms, tight. It took several seconds for Max to understand where they were and what were they doing.

“I’m…”

“Don’t say ‘I’m fine’ because I’ll snap.” Chloe interrupted her, frowning. “What’s going on? You keep scaring the shit out of me. Talk to me, Max.”

“I… I don’t know If I can.” Max said, looking away, ashamed.

_“Oh, boo hoo… Max is afraid! Max is afraid because she’s fucking insane!”_

She tried to keep going, to hide whatever was going on in her tormented mind but it wasn’t working. Chloe had a lot on her plate, she didn’t want to add her own problems to it, but it was getting worse. She couldn’t explain the voice in her head, the merged realities, the fact that sometimes she didn’t know where she was, in which timeline, in which reality.

She was terrified. What would happen if she blinked and suddenly she was again in the Dark Room? Or at the beach, with Chloe paralyzed from the neck down? Or at the bathroom, waiting to hear her final words, drowned by a gunshot?

“Please, Max… tell me. What’s going on?”

Max grabbed Chloe’s jacket in desperation.

“Chloe, I… I think I’m losing it.”.


	4. Die is easy

“Please, Max.” Chloe asked. “Tell me… what’s going on?”

“I… I think I’m losing it” Max said. Chloe felt how she grabbed her jacket brusquely. “I… I keep having this… flashes…”

The panic sank in Chloe’s chest like a heavy piece of ice.

_ “Holy shit…” _

“Wait… You mean like your… tornado vision?” Chloe asked, with her eyes wide open in fear. Max shook her head immediately.

“I’m not seeing the future, Chlo. Not this time. It’s… I keep losing track of… reality. This reality. Sometimes it’s like all the timelines I was in collided and… suddenly I don’t have a fucking clue where I’m standing. I’m afraid to open my eyes and find myself at… at the cliff again. Or in the Dark Room, or just… there, watching you die all over again in that bathroom.”

A chill ran down Chloe’s spine.

_ “Losing track of reality? This… oh, man this is fucking bad. Bad. Bad. Bad...” _

“Last week was… hella fucking insane, Max.” Chloe said. “You have a lot of stuff in your mind, that’s what those flashes are.”

She tried not to think she was only reassuring herself. Chloe was more afraid now than when they were facing the tornado.  She was afraid to see Max’s empty gaze, the same she saw multiple times when she used her powers and went in auto-pilot mode. During those periods, Max wasn’t herself at all. Just an aloof and odd version of the sweet girl she knew.

She was afraid to lose Max to her own mind. Just the thought of it made Chloe feel sick and uneasy.

“Look… Max, you’re fucking freaked out. I am too. I… I’d be surprised if you weren’t, honestly.” Chloe said, still holding Max’s arms. “You went through hell and back and… and I don’t even know half of it. I get it, ‘kay? I get if you don’t want to talk about it but… you’re honestly scaring the shit out of me, dude. I’m… I’m fucking terrified and I really, really need to help you somehow. I’m respon…

“Don’t say it.” Max snapped suddenly, tightening her pray at Chloe’s jacket. A spark of anger lighted her blue eyes. “Don’t say you’re responsible or guilty or whatever the fuck you’re about to say. I told you a thousand times I’m the only one to blame for this. I caused all this destruction. At the end I had to choose and… And deal with the consequences. I played god and it… just backfired spectacularly.”

“No one should be put in that position, Max.” Chloe said, shaking her a little. “No wonder you think you’re losing it. What kind of fucking insane choice was that? I mean… I… I’d have done the same if I was in your place. We’re no heroes, damn it. We did what we could, and that’s fucking it.”

“You were ready to die, Chloe.” Max said.

The brunette clenched her teeth and shook her head like she was trying to fight something inside her. Her breathing was so erratic that Chloe was afraid she would lose her temper at any second now. Her hands still grabbing the taller girl’s jacket were shaking uncontrollably. Max’s spaced out for a moment and shook her head to scare away whatever was on her mind.

“You were… ready to end it, to save everyone… And I was selfish. I couldn’t go back and let it happen. I may be broken now, fucking guilt-tripping myself about that but… letting you die after all I did to have you alive and with me? That’d have destroyed me. Literally.”

“Max, I’m not a fucking heroine or whatever.” Chloe snapped. “I was being selfish too.”

Max blinked twice and looked at her, her face livid and angrier than before.

“What the hell?”

“Look, I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately, okay?” Chloe said, fixing her eyes on Max’s. She could feel the tears forming behind her eyelids at a startling speed. “And… And I just… It was kind of… easy to make that choice at the moment. It’s not only because I know I’m a dipshit, troublemaker asshole and I don’t deserve to be here. But… staying around to see this mess was the hard choice for me. I… Sacrificing me made sense at the moment, Max. It’s what should have happened in the first place, it was my destiny.”

Max’s gaze muted from anger to concern to sadness in just a couple of blinks. She seemed to get the idea Chloe was trying to express with so much difficulty.

“Die is easy.” Chloe said, looking away. “You just… do and… and you don’t feel a fucking thing anymore. You don’t get to see the disaster you leave behind you, the people who… died because of you. My dad didn’t saw me or my mom suffer, he just… left, and...”

The tears started to flow and Max’s too. The two girls hugged and sat on the floor, their backs against the closed door of the closet, refusing to let go of the other as they cried their eyes out in desperation and fear, the sobs filling the cold room.

“I just wish… there was a way to save everybody.” Said Max, her voice cushioned by Chloe’s leather jacket. The taller girl could feel the trembling breath escaping through her lips. “If only… I could have taken your place in that bathroom…”

Max’s words hit Chloe like a heavy and cold slap in the face, replacing her sadness and guilt with anger and panic for a moment.

“Don’t you dare say shit like that, Max.” Chloe snarled. “Ever.”

Max stayed silent for once and Chloe was grateful for it.

“You saved me, even if we both know I don’t deserve it.” Chloe sighed bitterly. “I owe you big time. And I’m not sure if I will be able to repay you for it.”

Max pulled away from her and looked Chloe right in the eye, with an expression the punk couldn’t quite identify. It was a mix of guilt and… fear.

“You owe me nothing, Chloe.” She said, her voice trembling and her jaw tight.

Her eyes were fixed in Chloe’s with intensity and her voice was resolved, even if it was broken from the crying. She sounded like it was an irrevocable statement. 

“You… you don’t owe me. You don’t have to repay me in any way; there is no debt between you and me. Do you hear?”

“But…”

“Stop. It’s over.” Max said and… she seemed to be a little off. She was spacing out again. “Did you hear it? No fucking debt to be repaid. You can do whatever you want, because you don’t owe me nothing. Nothing!”

Max buried her face in Chloe’s chest and started to cry inconsolably again, muttering against her shirt.

“She doesn’t owe me. She doesn’t. She doesn’t. She doesn’t…”

“I got it, okay?” Chloe said, caressing Max’s hair in confusion. “Geez, this… this is...”

“It’s… it’s getting worse.” Max cried against her chest. “I… I don’t know what to do!”

“Talk to me.” Chloe tightened her grip around Max until the younger girl ended up almost sitting on her lap, crying her eyes out and grabbing her t-shirt like it was her only connection to reality. “What’s going on, Max?”

Max stayed silent for a few minutes and Chloe was getting anxious but she didn’t pry. Finally, Max pulled away and looked at her with her fearful blue eyes.

“Do you remember I told you about that nightmare I had? Back at the beach?”

Chloe nodded.

 

_ She could see it perfectly. She could spot the very same moment in which the Max in front of her wasn’t “her” Max anymore. Again.  _

_ She just came back, hugged her, talked to her with that sweet voice, so happy to be back and just see her… and now she was gone. She blacked out.  _

_ Max collapsed and Chloe grabbed her by her arms to prevent her fall. _

_ “I’ve got your back, Max.” Chloe whispered at her ear, knowing that the younger girl probably didn’t hear anything at all. _

_ The tornado was heading to Arcadia, unstoppable and relentless.They needed to reach the lighthouse. Fast. _

_ Pushing the panic and the fear to the deepest corners of her mind, Chloe passed one of Max’s arms over her shoulders and started the walk uphill, fighting with the rain and the wind that seemed to be determined to stop her at all costs. _

_ “Max will be okay.” She thought, over and over. “She’ll come back to me. She will. She will…” _

_ Max was small and thin, but even her dead weight was being too much to bare uphill with that weather. From time to time, Chloe had to stop to catch her breath and look at her, afraid she was gone for good this time. The blue haired girl couldn’t help to make sure if her friend’s nose was bleeding. It wasn’t. _

_ “I don’t know what the hell I’m gonna do without you to guide me, Mad Max.” She thought. She could feel the hysteria boiling in her chest, more and more intense as the seconds passed. “Please, please… come back to me. Please…” _

 

“You scared the shit out of me.” Chloe said, trying to erase that awful memory.

“Well… a lot of things happened during that… dream. I’m not even sure it was just a dream anymore. The point is that I had this… evil doppelganger… the other “me”… she kept saying awful things about me. And most of them… kinda were true at some point.”

Chloe listened carefully, trying to make sense of all of it. Even if she was tempted to tell Max that it was only a dream, she saw her space out at the beach and lose consciousness. Exactly the same way she fainted at the cliff on Monday, with her tornado vision. Chloe had to make an inhuman effort to keep the fear at bay.

“I said… “ Max swallowed loudly. “She said… that I was going to kill everyone because of you. And… and she was right. She said… awful things about me and us… and since the nightmare I can’t get her voice out of my head. It’s… teasing me and mocking me every fucking time I see one of my friends hurt, every time I see the pile of rubble that now is the town, every time I see one of the rescuers put another name on the casualties report… It’s driving me insane. I’m… I’m afraid she’s right.”

“What else did… she say?”

Max sighed with resignation. Chloe wondered how it was possible for the brunette to keep producing tears.

“She said I’m… manipulating you. She said you were… using me and my power to do what you wanted and now that I chose you…” Max’s struggle with words was clear. It was almost like part of her didn’t want to say those things. “She keeps saying that I’m… That I could… force you to be with me because you owe me and you feel you need to repay me for saving you.”

Maybe Chloe’s brain wasn’t working properly. Maybe it was the tight grip Max had on her jacket, the awkward proximity between them or Max’s warm breath against her skin, because there was no fucking way that the only thing that keept ringing in her mind was that last sentence. Not with all the shit Max just said.

_ “Be with me…” _ She thought, as her brain tried to process all that information in slow-motion.  _ “What the…” _

“I’m sorry if you felt I was using you or your power.” Chloe managed to say. “I was… such an idiot. I screwed up so bad this week… I’m not even surprised you think that way.”

“That’s not what I think, Chloe.” Said Max with a sharp edge. “I don’t know what the fuck is going on in my head but… the one who snapped me out of that nightmare, telling my other me to stop talking shit, was you. That’s why I say you don’t owe me anything. Because there is no fucking way I turn into her.”

They stayed there for a while after that, deep in thought, still holding each other like there was a possibility any of them would vanish. Max’s body was still being shaken by her sobs.

“Whatever this is… I’ll be there to help you fight it.” Chloe said after a while, caressing softly the brunette’s hair over her shoulder. “I told you at the cliff and I’m telling you again now. I got your back and I… I’ll always be with you.” She swallowed brusquely, and went on, trying to bear the awkward feeling in her guts. “Because that’s what I want. It’s… what I wanted since we were kids.”

She could feel Max nod against her shoulder but she didn’t say anything. Eventually, her sobs calmed down and were replaced by a fast and silent breathing.

_ “I need to be better. Cut the bullshit. I need to be better from now on. I… If I’ll have this second chance I don’t deserve.... I should make it fucking count. That’s the least I could do.” _

“We should go back.” Chloe said with a sigh. “I’m sure step-d… David… David is freaking out with our absence. And it’s getting fucking cold here without the windows in place.”

Max nodded again, still silent. She pulled away from Chloe and looked at her for a second, her expression unreadable, and then she got up. She helped Chloe to get up and grabbed the bag she filled with clothes.

Chloe went back to the desk and took the envelope she had hidden there and stored it in one of David’s coat pockets. She didn’t know what would happen, but she was sure as hell Blackwell wouldn’t need the handicapped fund anytime soon and they probably could make good use of it in the meantime. She also grabbed the box full of photographs, hidden behind the couch. She felt a little silly, but from now on, she’d treasure every single memory she could.

  
  


The night had fallen, and the short drive to the camp was mostly silent. Chloe tried in vain to fix her eyes on the road and don’t look at Max’s sad face every five seconds. Her silent was heavy and made Chloe feel itchy and awkward. Hear Max’s voice had become a need to her and she didn’t even noticed when that happened.

Chloe parked the truck just outside the camp and stepped out to carry the bags from the back of the vehicle. Just two backpacks and a bag with clothes and a couple of things they may need during their stay. Max helped her carry the luggage to the tent they shared and stocked it under their beds. Their hands touched a little when they were setting all up, sending an electric discharge through Chloe’s skin. She wondered if the younger girl felt the same.

After that, both went outside. The camp was lit by emergency lights displayed all over the place. Some people from FEMA were giving food not far away from them and the movement of the guys from the National Guard made the camp feel a little more crowded than before. The media had finally showed up, and some of the survivors were about to be transferred to Portland Hospital. Others were about to leave the camp with their families, mostly Blackwell students who weren't Arcadia Bay inhabitants.

More people arrived. Volunteers, government authorities and…

“Max?! Sweetie?”

Both girls stopped on their tracks and turned around slowly, almost carefully. Chloe could feel the awful lump in her throat tighten when she saw them and couldn't help to notice the tension in Max's face.

Ryan and Vanessa Caulfield were in the center of the camp, both of them smiling with relief at the sight of her daughter, safe and sound.


	5. Home

_ “Fuck. Fuck. FUCK. FUCK.” _

Max slammed a fist on one of the exterior walls of the gym and a shot of pain ran through her hand. She could see the fresh blood staining the white bandages still covering it. She was unbelievably furious…

_ “This can’t be happening. I’ll not let this shit happen, not after all I went through” _

How did they not get it? What was so difficult to understand? It was clear like water! It was so blatantly obvious that explaining it was somewhat ridiculous.

For once, Max was glad to be alone. Her parents went back to their hotel room, a couple of miles away from Arcadia. They tried to convince her to join them in the hotel for the night, instead of sleeping in a “filthy tent” like her mother called it. Obviously she refused the offer. They pry and insisted until Max lost her temper and send them away, holding back curses at all cost. She wanted to send them straight to hell, but she managed to contain the words. That surely wouldn’t had helped her, since she knew her mother was too strict to stand that. She had to admit Warren was right when he said that some of Chloe’s attitude had rubbed off on her.

They waited for Chloe to be gone to tell Max they wanted her back in Washington.

What kind of people do that?

_ “It was for the best though… _ ” Max thought, biting her lip.  _ “Chloe would have blown up right there if she knew. But, goddamnit… How am I supposed to deal with their bullshit?”  _

_ “You still can’t deal with your own mind.”  _ The other Max said in her mind. Max snorted brusquely. “ _ Sorry, I had to remind you I’m still here.” _

_ “Oh, just shut up. I’m done arguing with you… or me… or whatever the fuck.” _

 

_ _______________________________________________________________________________________________________ _

 

_ “Oh, honey we’re so glad you’re safe!” Cried Vanessa, hugging her daughter so tight, the girl almost couldn’t breathe. _

_ “We were so worried about you… and… Chloe? Chloe Price?” Asked Ryan, blinking in disbelief. _

_ Max’s parents looked at Chloe from head to toes; their eyes wide open in surprise. _

_ Of course, they remembered the tall blonde girl running in the back yard with a pirate hat chasing her daughter, not the young women with blue hair, tattoos and a tense expression on her face. _

_ “The very same” She said, trying to smooth her sharp tone in vain. _

_ “Wow, you’re all grown up.” Ryan said, lifting an eyebrow. He approached and gave her a firm pat on the back. “I’m glad you’re doing well too, despite everything.” _

_ “Me too. It’s good to see you again. How’s your mom?” Vanessa added, giving her a quick hug. _

_ “Yeah, we… we were lucky. Joyce was hurt but, she’ll be fine. Nothing serious at least.” _

_ Chloe’s tension was so obvious, Max was almost able to physically feel it.  _

_ Something was off and she knew it. She knew her parents too well to not take notice of the furtive exchange of glances between them. _

_ “Max, I should check up on Joyce.” Chloe said, grabbing her shoulder protectively. “You… probably need to be with them now. Come and find me later, ‘kay?” _

_ Max felt how her hands started to shake a little and swallowed audibly. She didn’t like the idea to lose sight of Chloe, but she knew it was impossible to be with her all the time. _

_ “Damn it, I… I can’t be Chloe-dependent like this. She… oh, shit.” Thought Max, shaking her head. _

_ “Sure thing. Stay safe, please.” Said Max, grabbing Chloe’s coat before she could go away. _

_ The blue haired girl nodded knowingly. _

_ “I’ll be with David and Joyce, don’t worry. I’ll be fine.” _

_ Chloe waved Ryan and Vanessa and left them alone with Max. The brunette just stared at her back, incapable of taking her eyes off the big coat she was wearing, the way her hips moved while walking, the strokes of blue hair escaping her ever present beanie… good Lord, it was like being in high school again looking at her crush at the other side of the hallway, despite the obvious change of scenery.  _

_ “Max… It’s late. Why don’t you come with us to the hotel?” Ryan said, grabbing Max by her shoulder, snapping her out of her daydream. “We can come back tomorrow to grab your things” _

_ Max looked at him in confusion and then, suddenly, something clicked in her head. _

_ “What?” Max asked, unbelieving. “What are you talking about? I’m not going with you.” _

_ Vanessa and Ryan exchanged a worried look. _

_ “Max, we came all the way down here to find you and bring you home… C’mon, we can come back in the morning to…” _

_ Max pulled away from her father’s grasp and looked at him with her eyes opened wide and her hands clenched in fists, shaking with anger _ _. _

_ “Home?” She thought bitterly. “Seattle never was my home. And Arcadia Bay _ _ …  _ _  it’s gone. The only definition of “home” I can come up with is a person now, who actually was here a minute ago.” _

_ “I’m not leaving Arcadia Bay, dad.” She said angrily. “There’s no fucking way I…” _

_ “Language, Maxine.” Vanessa said, frowning.  _

_ Max stared at her in confusion. _

_ “Really? Language?! Are you fucking kidding me?” thought Max, making an incredible effort to keep her mouth shut, but she gave her mother a cold glare. _

_ “Look, I don’t know what your idea is… And I’m honestly glad to see you, but… I’m not going anywhere.” Max said, crossing her arms over her chest. Even if she felt awful, her words sounded confident enough to make her parents doubt for a second. _

_ “Why are you acting like this, Maxine?” Vanessa Asked. “A lot of Blackwell students are gone by now, their families took them home. You’re…” _

_ Max wasn’t sure if her mother’s voice was always been so… loud. It was like someone was punching her words through her ears. It hurt like fucking hell and made her feel anxious. What was going on? _

_ “What about the rest?” Max asked bitterly. Her own words made a strange echo in her head. Loud, too loud… “What about the ones who are still here? What about Chloe?” _

_ Vanessa and Ryan looked at each other again briefly and that pissed Max off, more than before. _

_ “If you expected that I’d come back to you crying and asking you to take me home, you were wrong. Now, please, it’s late and I’ve been up and running  for the last fourteen hours. I need to catch some sleep. And it’s Max. Never Maxine.” _

_ “Okay, okay…” Ryan said, squeezing Vanessa’s shoulder as a warning, because the woman seemed to be about to say something. “Just… think about it through the night, alright? We’ll be back tomorrow morning. Let’s take this calmly, you just… had an awful experience, we don’t want to pry…” _

_ Vanessa was about to express her disagreement, judging for the look on her face, but a single glance of her husband talked her out of it. _

_ “Take this.” The black haired woman gave Max a little box. A cellphone with a charger. “Call us if you need anything, alright? Please… we just want to take care of you…” _

_ Her voice was so loud. SO LOUD. Why she was being so fucking LOUD? _

_ “I can take care of myself, mom.” Growled Max in response, open and closing her hands, hanging at her sides. Her headache intensified awfully and she felt her mouth so dry it was almost unbearable. “I know I’ve been here alone only a month, but I’m not the same Max you drove here in September. And I have nothing to think about, I made my choice.” _

_ “You know you can’t do that…” _

_ “The hell I can’t!” _

_ “Maxine!” _

_ LOUD. LOUD. LOUD. Something was not right. At all. _

_ __________________________________________________________________________________________________________ _

 

Max growled bitterly and punched the wall again. What the hell she was supposed to do now?

_ “Hey Chloe, my parents came and want me to go back with them to Seattle again. Sorry, but I’ll just comply and ignore everything that we went through the past week and the fact that I destroyed this very same town because I’m madly in love with you and I couldn’t let you die. See you in a couple of years!” _

“She’s gonna be pissed.” Max muttered, hiding her face on her hand.

_ “Wowzers!… You say it like it’s something unexpected.”  _ The other Max said, bitterly.

_ “Don’t start with your shit talk again. She would have the right to be pissed off.” _

_ “You know she’s gonna blow up, full of hellas and fucks and curses… yeah, our mother will love that attitude.” _

Max sighed in frustration and looked at the dark night sky above her head, full of bright stars.

_ “Holy shit, why I keep hearing you?!” _

_ “Because I am you, dumbass. I’m not going to leave you alone that easily.” _

Max shook her head and take a couple of deep breaths. Between the frustration about her parents’ attitude and the countless panic attacks she had all day, she felt so worn out that she was certain she could sleep even on the ground if she just lied there. If the nightmares didn’t wake her up, of course.

Max came back to the tent, knowing she couldn’t face Chloe just yet. The camp was almost silent, most of the survivors sleeping or gone, while the rescuers and the rest of the volunteers were helping where they could.

She let herself fall onto the bed and covered her face with her bandaged hands. The tears and sobs came sooner than expected when her anger and hopelessness finally settled in.

As the minutes passed, she felt her body more and more tired. Without even noticing it, she slipped away to the land of nightmares.

____________________________________________________________________

 

_ “Max you’re a fucking child…” Said Chloe, a smirk on her face as she blinked one of her piercing blue eyes to her. “I’m so over your hipster shit… and all the mushy things you say about saving me. You love me? That’s why you let the town die and hurt my mom? Typical  _ _ whimsical  _ _ bullshit.” _

_ “You’re not Chloe” Replied Max with defiance. “I know she’d never say that.” _

_ “Boo hoo, how are you so confident in yourself all of the sudden?” Teased Chloe, as her malefic grin went wider. “You’re my personal puppet. You’ll even challenge your parents for me. I see how your mother looks at me. And you’re more worried about my supposed feelings than that!” _

_ “I don’t give a fuck about their opinion.” Max said. “I challenged a big fucking tornado for her. Do you really think my parents will be able to stop me?” _

_ “Yeah, the storm you caused.” Chloe laughed. “Why did you get rewind powers if you don’t know how to use them? You fucked up the entire universe for me. And I don’t even said I love you!  _ _ Don’t you feel like an idiot? Rachel’s dead and you’re still alive… at least I can have you as a consolation prize. It’s not like you would complain about it anyway, you’re so in love with me that even that scenario is good enough for you. Pathetic.” _ __

_ “That’s.Not.True” _

_ “Max here disagrees” Chloe said, crossing her arms over her chest and smiling. _

_ Max’s doppelganger appeared and leaned on Chloe’s side naturally. _

_ “You know that’s true. You know Chloe still loves Rachel. And now that she’s dead, she’ll need someone to use.” _

_ “Fuck off!” Shouted Max furiously. “You may be right. Maybe I’m so fucking insecure that I have this stupid nightmares and fears and whatever this is. I may be broken but I’m sure about my feelings. And yeah, maybe Chloe still loves Rachel. So what? I want her to be fine and happy, even if it’s not with me. And neither you, my parents or a big ass storm are going to stop me!” _

_ She turned around and walked away, leaving Chloe and her own double behind. _

________________________________________________________________________________________________   
  


Max woke up suddenly and sat on the bed so fast that she went dizzy. She shook her head, trying to get rid of the blurry vision and the awfully loud sound of her heartbeat in her ears.

“Wow, wow… You’re okay?”

Chloe closed the zip of the tent and approached her. As always, the only thing that Max could advert in her gaze was worry.

“Yeah, just.... another stupid dream.” Said Max, looking away.

“I was worried when you didn’t show up and… hell, I couldn’t find you anywhere. You need to stop doing that. I freaked out.” Said Chloe, trying to control the worry in her voice.  She sat down in Max’s bed, a little more close than the brunette anticipated.

“I’m sorry, I… needed a moment.” Max sighed. “I didn’t had exactly the nicest family reunion...”

“What happened?” Asked Chloe in confusion. “I thought you’d like to see your parents and that they’d be relieved to see you okay.”

“Yeah, well…” Max bitted her down lip and grabbed Chloe’s hand, which was resting over the sheets. “Listen… we need to talk about something.”

“What is it? Did something happen?”

Max sighed and looked at her worried. It was obvious that Chloe was in denial, because what had happened was really predictable and there was no way for Chloe to ignore it, except doing it on purpose.

“My parents want me to come back to Seattle. They even tried to convince me to go with them tonight. They… They will insist on the matter, they don’t give up easily”

When her eyes met Chloe’s, she knew that whatever she could say was in vain. A spark of realization appeared in Chloe’s gaze and her beautiful blue eyes darkened as Max’s words sank in. Max expected to find anger, fury, hate, resentment in them… but the only thing she found, was a thick and heavy sadness as the tears came and rolled down her cheeks nonstop.

There was no curses. No hellas and fucks were given. Chloe just… shut down and the image of the blue haired girl curled up in a ball over the bed and crying her eyes out silently was like a stab in the chest to Max. If someone appeared and shot her at the heart… or just ripped it off her chest with bare hands… that pain would be nothing in comparison to what she felt looking at Chloe’s face right then.

Max laid down next to her and hugged her with all her strength, her body pressed to Chloe’s back so tight that she almost couldn’t breathe. Max could feel how the taller girl’s body was shaking from the sobs she tried so much to hold back.

“You need to listen to me, Chloe.” Said Max, her lips almost touching her friend’s ear. “Listen to me carefully. There is no fucking way in hell I’ll go anywhere without you. They don’t know what we went through, what we saw, what we lived… what I lived through this insane week.”

Chloe’s sobs intensified.

_ “I don’t want to hear her crying like this never again in my life, damn it!”  _ Thought Max in desperation.

“I know I’m broken and this is all so recent… and after what happened to Rachel and the storm and whatever, shit gets confusing.” Max continued, trying to steady her voice, broken as the tears started to fall. “I’ve already said it but I need to repeat it. You don’t owe me and you don’t have to be with me if you don’t want to. But I just… know you need me as much as I need you, Chloe.”

Chloe pulled away from her embrace and Max felt how her gut twisted in panic.

_ “No. No, no, no, please. Don’t…” _

Her hands started to shake and the lump in her throat was so thick she couldn’t breathe. But the taller girl just rolled over to face her, their noses just inches away. Her blue eyes were reddish and puffy, still spilling tears all over her face.

“Maybe… “ Chloe’s voice sounded so broken that Max couldn’t help caress her cheek with trembling fingers. Chloe swallowed and started over. “Maybe they’re right. The town is gone and… there is no future here for you. You have a choice now…”

“No, Chloe. Forget the future; I’ve made my mind already.” Said Max, trying to stop her anger to taint her voice. “What’s left to decide? There is no question, Chlo. I’d choose you every fucking time. You’re all that matters to me.” 

“Listen, I get it. I do, but It makes sense, Max. Arcadia is gone… it’s not our home anymore.”

“You’re right.” Said Max, resting her forehead on Chloe’s. “My home is lying in front of me, wearing an ugly men coat and has blue hair.” 

Despite the tears, Chloe couldn’t repress a chuckle. A genuine and almost happy chuckle that made Max’s chest feel a lot lighter. For a moment she expected the voice in her head to appear and ruin the moment, crush the little spark of happiness in her chest, but her other self remained silent.

“I love you, Max.” Chloe whispered, her eyes fixed in Max’s.

That’s why the other Max didn’t say anything. There was undeniably sincerity in Chloe’s gaze. She even blushed and pursed her lips, nervous.

“Chloe…”

“You’re right. Shit gets confusing.” Chloe interrupted her. A shadow of fear darkened her eyes as she mumbled so fast Max had to struggle to catch all the words. “But… I’m in love with you. Like… I just know. I feel it. I should have told you this sooner. I was about to at the cliff but… shit hit the fan and…It’s… and I got angry at the diner and… and then you kissed me and I couldn’t… and you felt sorry about it and I just… fuck, this is... ”

Max closed the gap between them and interrupted her with a kiss. A kiss this time Chloe returned, holding Max in her arms and squeezing her tight.

This was so different, Max thought, It wasn’t awkward like before, just… warm, comforting and natural. Like it was meant to be.  

There were no voices in her head when she leaned in, deepening the kiss when she had the chance. Chloe hummed in surprise but she didn’t stop. Her hands glided over Max’s back, up and down almost in desperation. If this was a way to deal with the demons in her head, if this was a way to finally shut up all those awful voices in her mind… She knew she wanted this, but she didn’t realize how badly she wanted it until now. It was almost like a need. A need to survive, maybe, because when their lips connected, that’s what she felt.

Chloe was the one who finally break the kiss, trying to catch her breath.

Her chest went up and down rapidly and Max could feel the frantic beating of her heart against her own. “Maybe you didn’t notice, but… I love you too, Chloe.” 

Chloe let escape a short and low laugh. She rolled and rested face up, her eyes fixed in the ceiling, guiding Max’s head to rest in the crook of her neck.

“Listen… I don’t know what will happen tomorrow but…”

“We’ll figure it out.” Said Max confidently. “Together.”

Chloe squeezed her a little and kissed her forehead.

“Together.”


	6. Silence

_The noise in her head was too loud. Unbearable. The voices whispering, shouting, crying, cursing…_

_“This is all your fault”_

_“Why do you have this power if you don’t know how to use it?”_

_“You are the real storm”_

_“I have to frame your innocence my way!”_

_“You’re selfish. You’re a monster. You killed hundreds!”_

_“Maybe you’ve only been delaying my real destiny”_

_“You messed up time so badly that you altered the course of everything!”_

_“Max Caulfield… you have a gift.”_

_“Boo hoo! Max is afraid!”_

_“This wasn’t supposed to happen!”_

_“Death will claim her either way. You don’t get it? You didn’t save anyone!”_

_“I’m in a nightmare and I can’t wake up… unless I put myself to sleep”_

_“Do you want to be with me forever in… the Dark room?_

_“Enjoying the view, murderer?”_

_“All this chaos and destruction for just one girl!”_

_“She’s dead. He killed her…, he dozed and killed her.”_

_“What kind of world does this?”_

_“You better don’t rewind and take that kiss back.”_

_“We have all the time in the world… for now.”_

_“... and you fell right into my hands…”_

 

_LOUD. LOUD. LOUD. Too fucking LOUD._

_“Stop it. You need to stop this. Now. Run. Escape. You need…”_

 

_Max ran through the woods. Her breathing was erratic and her feet clumsy as she fought through the bushes and low trees, trying to stop her. Even in daylight, the environment around her felt dark and menacing. She felt like she was being watched, so she kept on going, fighting her way through the wet and dark forest. Fallen trees and branches filled her path, as she tried not to think that ‘her’ storm was the cause for all of this._

_Max stopped dead and looked around, trying to find the source of her uneasiness. Someone was watching her, she could feel it almost physically._

_While her eyes wandered around they stopped at a bird, frozen in midair, its wings widely spread. The clouds in the sky were still, reminding her of a painting._

_There was no sound, no movement, no life._

_Everything was frozen. No matter how far she went, everything stayed motionless._

_Still._

_Dead._

_She finally reached the lighthouse, at the top of the cliff. She didn’t want to be there. She was afraid that, all of a sudden, the sky would turn black again. She was afraid she had to feel the electricity in the air again as another storm approached Arcadia to finish the job._

_The sea was frozen in time as well. A wave stopped midair after crashing onto the rocks below. Everything felt surreal and odd when time was frozen._

_She held onto her head with both hands, drilling her injured fingers into her skull as she tried to shut the voices in her mind, which had become a constant mumble. There were so many of them that she couldn’t catch any clear word of them._

_Trying to rise above all the noise, a single voice, repeated the same words over and over again like a mantra. These words felt like a lifeline to reality._

_"I’m Maxine Caulfield. I’m Maxine Caulfield and… I’m in Arcadia Bay. I never was in the Dark Room. I survived the storm I created. I… I choose Chloe over Arcadia Bay… I choose her because I love her.  I promised her to not use my powers never again. Never. Never. Never again…”_

_Suddenly Jefferson’s voice interfered with a soft tone and whispered in her ears._

_“You lied.”_

_She knelt on the ground and let escape an strangled sob._

_She could feel the blood leaking from her nose…_

 

 

Max woke up with a strangled gasp, fighting with the tight grip she felt around her waist. Her body was trembling in panic. 

“Shhh, Max.” A familiar voice whispered in her ear, soft and fondly. The warm breath against her skin gave her relaxation immediately. “It’s me. It’s okay. You’re fine.”

“S-sorry.” Max apologized, leaning onto Chloe’s warm presence behind her.

She checked her face below the nose with her fingertips and sighed in relief when she noticed there was no a single stain of blood.

“I had another…”

“Another nightmare, I know.” Chloe interrupted her voice soft and low. “You were talking in your sleep.”

She seemed to be totally awake, even though the sun hadn’t rise up yet.

Max’s chest jumped in fear.

“What did I say?” She asked, trying to not make a big deal about it.

Chloe’s silence made Max feel uneasy. Her grip around Max’s waist intensified.

“Chlo?”

“Just… stuff. About the Dark Room and… you just repeated “never”. Like, a lot. I couldn’t wake you up, you scared me...” Chloe answered, drowning her face in Max’s hair.

The younger girl could feel the warm breath against her neck.

“It was just… another stupid nightmare. I’m getting really tired of this…”

“I know.” Chloe whispered. “You’ll get over this. We…, we both will.”

Even though the bed was small and uncomfortable, they lay together for a while. Slowly, the sun rose and lit the tent gently, accompanied by the usual sounds of the camp waking up around them.

Max didn’t want to get up. She felt so good, being wrapped in the itchy blankets, feeling Chloe’s chest go up and down against her back. The soft and warm breath on her neck gave her goose bumps all over her body. She couldn’t care less what was about to happen in a couple of hours, when her parents would be back at the camp. At this very moment she knew for certain, she wanted to wake up like this every single day, for the rest of her life.

_“You’re so self…”_

_“I know.”_ Max interrupted her other self with such a confident tone that she didn’t react. “ _And honestly? I couldn’t care less right now. So get over it.”_

_“... Alright.”_

 

 

 

Vanessa and Ryan Caulfield were waiting for her at the camp entrance.

Their car was parked behind them, ready to take off. Both of them seemed surprised when Max didn’t come alone. They kind of expected it at some point, but wished it wouldn’t have been the case. Not that they could do anything about it, honestly. 

Max could feel both of their burning gazes on her face. She wished her determination was clear in her expression, but she couldn’t deny the awful feeling in her guts. Cold sweat wetted her forehead and neck. Her fingers, intertwined with Chloe’s, were slightly trembling. In a vain of giving her lover the needed confidence, the blue haired girl caressed the back of her hand with her thumb.

Max noticed Vanessa’s eyes lingering on their united hands for a moment before she changed her view back to her daughters face. As their sights found each other, Max could see a spark of understanding in her dark eyes. She had understood and an equal amount of anger and conclusion filled her eyes.

“Mom…, Dad…” Max greeted them distantly.

_“I’m amazed by your ability to be a dick even without my help”_

“How’re you doing?” Asked Ryan, after a brief silence.

“Better.” Max replied. “You wanted to talk.”

It wasn’t a question.

“Have you thought about what we said?” Asked Ryan. Max could see in his gaze that he already knew the answer to his question.

“I did. The answer didn’t change.” Max tried to smooth her tone.

“Listen… I know that you want the best for me. I know you’re just concerned about me and… my future.”

“That’s right.” Said Vanessa. “We just want what’s best for you.”

“I know and I’m grateful for that. Seriously.” Max sighed heavily. She felt so tired, so worn out… “But right now, what you think is the best for me, isn’t exactly what I need.”

_“Wow, the nerd has nerve…”_

Ryan and Vanessa exchanged a worried look. 

“This past week… a lot of sh… things happened. I really went through a lot and… to be honest, the only thing I really need is to be where I have the feeling that I can get better again. And that’s wherever Chloe is.”

“What’s the thing with you two?” Ryan asked.

“I’m in love with her.” Max said plainly and straight forward.  

She could hear Chloe breathing in sharply due to her direct answer.

“We went through a lot and…”.

“You’re what?” Vanessa asked, trying to hold off her indignation.

_“Fan - fucking - tastic.”_

_“You said it… I warned you, dumbass.“_

_“Ha, even our mother can’t believe you’re this fucked up!”_

 

“You heard me.”

“How… is that even…”

“It doesn’t really matter.” Max interrupted her. “It’s just how things are. The worst mistake of my life was go to Seattle with you five years ago and leave Chloe behind. I’m not making that mistake again. Not now nor ever again.” 

“Max, what’s… you can’t be serious, are you?” Vanessa said, letting out a hysterical laugh.

“Vanessa…” Ryan glared at her seriously.

“I mean… I mean that’s not possible! How? When... why?” 

The woman was trembling in indignation and anger. Ryan grabbed her by the shoulder to comfort her and clarify the situation.

“Vanessa… Please, calm down…”

“What’s the meaning of this, Maxine?”

“Mom, things are what they are.” Said Max. Why did Vanessa’s voice felt so loud? So… annoying. Max was aware that she wasn’t speaking calmly, but every word she verbalized felt like a punch on her temples.

 

_“Annoying, isn’t it? As if you didn’t have enough voices in your head…”_

_“Shut up. Please...”_

 

“Maxine Caulfield, you better make sense of this right here, right now. What’s going on? What happened to you? How this is even possible?”

“I can’t tell you what happened!” Replied Max, her teeth clenched. She almost crushed Chloe’s hand with her own. “Don’t you get it? I CAN’T talk about it!”

Max closed her eyes momentarily, as her mind started to collapse again.

 

_“Max… do you wanna be forever with me in… the Dark Room?”_

_“Nobody cares about me! Nobody!”_

_“Yeah… you’re a real everyday hero…”_

_“Nobody will ever miss your punk-ass, would they?”_

_“I would… don’t take her away, because I… CAN’T....”_

 

Chloe’s hand squeezed hers tightly and that simple gesture made Max come back to, at least what felt like, reality. She focused on the only words she knew were her anchor to the present.

_“I’m Maxine Caulfield. I’m in Arcadia Bay. I survived the storm I caused. I saved Chloe. I never was in the dark room”_

“Can’t you just back me up?” Max asked finally, ignoring the argument between her parents. Vanessa looked at her so angry and hurt that Max almost could feel it physically.

It was awful. 

“I backed you up with everything. I always wanted you to succeed, to be confident that you had a gift, you never did something like this ever! If I knew you’d be here telling me now that you’re not coming back and you’re… you’re… What on earth happened to you?”

“Life happened! A fucking tornado happened!” Max finally snapped, rising her voice.

_“Your storm. Your fault.”_

_“I survived. I choose and I wanted Chloe to be alive.”_  

“A teacher I idolized turned out to be a monster! A damn psychopath!”

_“I could frame you in a dark corner. Frame you in a moment of desperation. You’re not so innocent anymore… and that’s because of me... “_

_“I never was in the Dark Room._

_It didn’t happen in this reality._

_It didn’t. It didn’t. Jefferson is dead…”_

“My friend almost jump to her death because of him and I had to stop her!”  
_“I’m in a nightmare and I can’t… wake… up! Unless… I put myself to sleep.”_

_“I saved her. I reached out and she did too._

_I pulled her out of that roof._

_And I did it on my own.”_

“Chloe di... almost died in front of me so many times that I can’t even count!”

_“I love you, Max… see you around…”_

_“She didn’t die… she’s alive, right next to me._

_I saved her._

_I saved her every time. And I’d do it again…”_

“So, of course I’m fucked up! How else would I be?”

“Hey, Max. Breathe, you need to calm down…” Chloe whispered anxiously to her.

Max avoided her worried gaze.

“Vanessa, you need to stop this.” Ryan said. Her eyes were never leaving Max. They seemed about to pop out from his face. “This is not the way…” he said.

“You’re taking her side?!” Vanessa asked in desperation. “She’s your daughter; you can’t just allow her to…”

“Vanessa, drop it.” Ryan insisted. He was shocked, it was obvious, but his concern about his daughter seemed to overwhelm all the worries.

 

_LOUD. LOUD. LOUD._

_Stop it. Somehow… please..._

 

Max pressed her free hand against her forehead. She felt like someone had dropped a hammer on her skull, tearing it open. Her vision got more and more blurry by the minute.

_“My head… damn it…”_

“Max, what happened?” Ryan asked softly and caring. He stepped forward and grabbed Max by her shoulder. She recoiled instinctively at contact. When was the last time she hadn’t done that when someone tried to reach out to her?”

Even though Ryan’s voice was soft and calm, in her head, it seemed loud like a scream.

“Did… did somebody hurt you? What…?”

 

_“You need to be framed my way! You stupid bitch!”_

_“Oh, if Nathan could just look at this set up!”_

_“You’re… perfect… the perfect subject.”_

_“You’re going to die tonight, Max… but before that… we have all the time in the world.”_

 

“I… can’t.” Max managed to say, still looking at her father’s hand in panic. Her eyes were full of tears at this point, about to flow down her face. “Please, don’t make me to…”.

“Max, please…”

“Max, I’m here. We could…” Chloe squeezed her hand again and spoke in a soft and warm tone, almost unknown to Max. “Everything will be fine, Max. I promise…”

“You’re clearly in shock because of what happened.” Vanessa said, still angry. “Talk to us, Maxine. You’re not thinking right… you’re confused and it makes sense, we can help...”

“Vanessa, drop it.” Ryan said furiously. “Seriously, this is not helping…”

“Confused?” Max snapped. “I can’t tell you what happened this week because I can’t even verbalize it myself. Shit went down, for all of us. That’s the only thing you need to know!”

“Maxine, we have the right…!”

“Vanessa, STOP!”

“Ryan, this is…”

Max wasn’t even listening anymore. Everything was too loud. She released Chloe’s hand and pushed her ears against her head furiously, digging her nails in her skin, desperate to cushion the noise… 

It didn't help because the noise was inside her head too.

 

_Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it._

 

“She’s not well, Vanessa. Can’t you see that?!”

“And what are we supposed to do, Ryan? Huh? She needs our help!”

“She needs something else. How is possible you can’t see it?!”

“Stop with your bullshit for a damn minute!” Chloe snarled. “Max?! Max, can you hear me?! Goddamn it!” 

Her parents kept arguing.

Chloe was looking at her, panic growing in her gaze as she figured that Max was about to break entirely if it hadn’t already happened. She desperately held her by the shoulders… 

The sound of the camp behind them…

The whispers of the forest around them…

The singing of the birds…

The rumble of a car coming to life not far away…

The voices… 

 _“What are you gonna do about it? Huh?”_ The other Max teased her in her mind.

_“You can stop it. You know you can do it, don’t you? You have the power after all. You can make this noise go away…”_

_“I can’t… I promised…”_

_“Bullshit. You know you’d do it. You need it. You’re selfish enough... You have to do it. Stop it.”_

_“No.”_

_“Stop it!”_ the voice insisted, frantically. _“You have the power. You destroyed a town already, why not be selfish all the way? You can feel time itself twisting between your fingers already. You need this to STOP. DO IT.”_

_“No!”_

_“DO IT.”_

_“NO!”_

_“STOP IT!”_

_“Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. STOP IT…”_

_“PLEASE. MAKE. IT. STOP.”_

 

“Max?” Chloe’s voice sounded so far away, lost in the distance… “MAX?!” 

Max raised her hand, feeling that known tingling on her skin, like time itself was flowing between her fingers. With just one movement, everything could be… silent… 

“MAX, DON’T!” 

Time froze.

And silence finally fell around Max as she almost drowned in it. She needed it so much… 

“Max… what… what the fuck did you do?”

Max looked at Chloe. She wasn’t frozen like her parents in front of her, in the middle of their argument. She wasn’t frozen like the bird flying above them, still in midair with its wings wide open. She was… _moving,_ looking around them with her eyes wide open and her eyebrows so high that were almost hidden by her messy blue hair. Max could almost feel her panic, when the fingers she had curled around Max’s right wrist started to shake. 

Then reality hit Max like a slap on her face. She could read it in Chloe’s fearful eyes.

The silence broke when Jefferson’s soft voice took over.

_“You lied…”_

Max released her grip to time and everything flowed. The noise came again, drowning everything, clashing with her ears like loudly waves, her parents kept arguing like nothing happened… and the look in Chloe’s face… her blue eyes looking at her with fear and… disappointment? 

Max had seen it.

Chloe had been moving even though everything was frozen, still, stopped.

How was that possible?

The first drop of blood leaked from her nose and before she could realize, all went black. Silence came again and only one voice remained, mourning and soft like a whisper.

…

…

_"Max… please… I can’t lose you too...”_

_..._

_…_


	7. Answers

_Max was awake but didn’t open her eyes. She felt oddly comfortable, warm and relaxed, sitting on something soft and cozy. Her mind was in silence, almost blank. It felt so good and peaceful that way. She didn’t know where she was or how she got there and something prevented her from trying to remember those things._

_“C’mon. Wake up.”_

_Max opened her eyes reluctantly and looked around in confusion. As odd as it sounds, she was sitting on a soft and red diner booth. The air was filled with the sweet smell of pancakes and breakfast while a low tune of folk music was playing on the jukebox at the opposite side of the room._

_She sort of recognized the place, but it wasn’t exactly like it had been before. It felt like a lifetime had passed between this moment and the last time she had been sitting at the Two Whales._

_The sun lit the empty place warmly. It felt like it summer was close to arrive. Max softly inhaled the sweet scent of syrup and the lovely smell of the pancake-mix about to be cooked._

_Just as she thought about how odd it was to be alone at the diner, the known tingling of the small bell over the door interrupted her thoughts._

_A girl wearing a red flannel, jeans and sneakers walked in, looking around with curiosity and a naughty smile curling her full lips. Her blond hair falling down her back like a golden waterfall and her hazel eyes looked around almost unintentionally. A blue feather hanged from her left ear._

_Max recognized her, of course. Rachel Amber. The missing girl she know so little about but became a big part of her life in almost no time. What was she doing here?_

_The girls exchanged a look and smiled at each other for a moment. The blonde walked over and sat down in front of Max. She rested her hands on the table, playing with her thumbs, as she was trying to find something to do._

_“Max” She greeted with a smile._

_“Hey.”_

_“I’m sure you have a lot of questions, don’t you?”_

_“Yeah, probably. But… I’m not sure if I want to ask them.” Said the brunette reluctantly._

_Rachel smiled sadly, her eyes fixed in Max’s._

_“I can imagine. You went through hell and back. It makes sense that you want to be here and just relax for a bit.” The girl said. “But unfortunately, you’re not here for that.”_

_“Then why I am here?” Max asked. She looked around for a moment. “And where is here?”_

_“I don’t know exactly. It seems like the Two Whales just… cleaner and empty.” Rachel pointed out, looking around too, her eyebrows a little frowned. “I suppose it’s wherever you want to be with whoever you want accompany you.”_

_Rachel smiled at her again and Max swallowed audibly._

_“So… If you’re here… That means I’m dead?”_

_The blonde girl sighed and then shook her head, making the blue feather to dance against her neck._

_“No, you’re not dead. I think you finally… well, broke down. I’m no psychiatrist, but I’m sure you’re aware of your… condition. Technically I’m just part of your mind, I’m not the… real Rachel.”_

_Max nodded and looked down, not sure about what to reply to that. She just let the silence win terrain while Rachel -whatever- looked through the window with a thoughtful expression._

_“I suppose I’m imagining all of this … You’re not really here. I’m just insane as I thought.” Max said finally._

_Rachel sighed._

_“You’re not insane. Maybe you’re close to be…, but it actually makes sense. You’re broken. You tried to be strong for way too long and well… like our Chloe’d say: Shit happens.”_

_A stitch of jealousy got Max off guard when she heard those words. The way Rachel said “Our Chloe” just made her feel uneasy and uncomfortable. She felt so stupid..._

_“Relax.” She said, like she read her mind. She probably could though, thought Max. “I’m just part of your mind, remember? The real Rachel is gone and Chloe is madly in love with you, no doubt about that.”_

_“I guess…”_

_“You don’t guess. You know.” Rachel smiled fondly at her. “Now, we don’t have much time to beat around the bush. You remember what happened?”_

_Max frowned. She didn’t want to think about that, but she know that arguing with a product of her own imagination was stupid, so she complied. Max closed her eyes and thought about what was the last thing she remembered._

_When she opened her eyes again, both of them were standing in the middle of the FEMA camp, exactly like Max remembered it. Frozen and still._

_“I broke my promise” She finally said, looking at her own image, frozen in front of her._

_She looked so… overwhelmed. So tired… The dark spots under her eyes, the reddish on them, the desperation and pain painted all over her face. Chloe was grabbing her wrist with that gaze full of fear. Max tried not to think about the disappointed look Chloe wore when they looked at each other, frozen in time._

_The strange situation made her remember the nightmare she had before blacking out at the beach. The strange path with all the moments she lived through together with Chloe._

_“You did. You needed to do it in order to keep your sanity.” Sighed Rachel, looking at the scene. Her expression was as sad as Max’s. “Sorry to say your parents didn’t help much. Don’t blame them though, it’s hard enough as it is to explain what’s exactly wrong with you.”_

_“I just wanted a second of silence. No voices, no… guilt and remorse…” Max said, looking down, ashamed of her weakness._

_“PTSD is a bitch.” Rachel concluded. “After all you went through, it makes sense. Well, look at where we are now, you’re having a conversation with a dead girl.”_

_Max snorted and walked around her other frozen self and Chloe. She wondered if she’d forgive her for breaking the promise. She thought about the eventuality that her slip would screw up the universe again and cause another disaster she’d have to survive._

_“Honestly, we don’t know.” Said Rachel. Again, she was answering all the questions Max had formulated in her mind. “But if it does break reality apart, it makes you responsible. Like the tornado thing. You know you’re responsible. It’s time you accept that.”_

_Max frowned at the blonde._

_“I accepted it the very moment I destroyed that photograph.” She said, but her voice shook a little._

_“Not exactly.” Said Rachel, walking around her and looking at Chloe’s face with a sad smile. “You knew you’re responsible. There is a big part of you which is in denial, trying to shut up that other voice in your head. You’re responsible for the consequences, but you can’t help but think how to get away from it.”_

_“Fact is, you can’t. Not now, nor ever.”_

_“So, what I’m supposed to do?” Max asked, raising her voice and clenching her fists. “Let that other voice torture me until I’m freaking out of my mind and lose my sanity?”_

_“You’re supposed to listen and accept that maybe she’s right at some point. Remember the nightmare?” Asked Rachel, turning her gaze to her. “She said you manipulated people with your powers.”_

_Max crossed her arms over her chest and let slip a growl._

_“I didn’t.”_

_“Max, don’t play fool.” Said Rachel, her voice sounding harsh for the first time. “You know you did, but you’re too afraid to admit it. You didn’t do it with bad intentions though, that’s what matters in the end. That applies for every situation as well as for the tornado. You didn’t want to destroy Arcadia and especially not to kill all those people. You were just trying to save your best friend. This is the price to pay for that.” Rachel smiled a little. “No pun intended.”_

_Max sighed in defeat. The awful lump in her throat intensified._

_“Should I… should I had let her die after all?” Max asked with shaky voice, fear climbing up her throat._

_“You didn’t really have a choice, you know that.” Said Rachel, shaking her head. “You chose what you chose because it was the only way you could keep… living. Or functioning, maybe that’s the appropriate word to use. Do you think you could go on with Chloe being dead?”_

_Just the thought of Chloe entering that bathroom again and dying without knowing anything… without knowing how much Max loved her, without remembering all the things they went through together that week, thinking she was all alone, abandoned by every single person she loved…_

_Just the thought of all that made her feel sick._

_“She deserved better.” Max said plainly. “She’d been through so much shit… and she’s the only one that… knows what I’ve been through. She was there most of the time. I… I’m not sure If I could cope with the fact that everything I did to save her was useless.”_

_Rachel nodded in agreement._

_“Love is selfish sometimes. It’s just the way it is. And you had the power to avoid her death, so why not use it? What was the point of all along it if you didn’t? You used your power in way more situations and occasions that you were actually supposed to, anyways. Probably that’s why things got out of hand.”_

_Max nodded, knowingly. She knew she was over the line when she used her powers to let a can of paint fall over Victoria, or when she made fun of her and came back to lie and comfort her… or the time she rewind just to give the correct answer in class like a brat. She regretted to use it to kiss Chloe over and over again when she dared her. She kind of manipulated Chloe to do it, even knowing she had feelings for Rachel…_

_Her other self was right. Good intentions or not. Max sat down on the grass and hugged her knees tight._

_“I did manipulate people. I even used my powers for… a lot of stupid stuff and whims. If I knew the consequences…”_

_“You knew.” Said a familiar voice. When Max lifted her head up, her eyes stumbled across her own ones. Or those of an another version of herself. The very same voice that had been haunting her the past few days. “You predicted your own screw up with that vision you had during Jefferson’s class. You didn’t get the warning though.”_

_“I can’t believe I was such an idiot. I can’t believe I just overused my powers like that, I… I just can’t believe I was so irresponsible, thinking that there were not strains attached to that kind of ability. Everything would be so different now If I wasn’t a coward the first time I saw Chloe confronting Nathan in that stupid bathroom.”_

_“You were a coward.” Said the other Max, crossing her arms over her chest and looking at her with disdain. “You could have stepped up, said something, even take the fucking bullet for her. But you chose to be an idiot and you overuse your powers. What are you going to do about it now?”_

_“You can’t keep dueling about the past, Max.” Rachel said. She sat down next to her and laid an arm around her shoulders. “You need to look forward from now on. You can’t change the past. Not anymore.”_

_“I know. Even if I didn’t lose my powers after the storm, I can’t keep using them. Even if it’s so tempting sometimes. I need to be stronger and more resolved about this. I can’t… just break down like I did.”_

_“It’s nice to have all the answers Max, I know that. But not if it will backfire on you like this.”_

_“You should stop being so self righteous” Said the other Max, with a sharp tone. “You need to accept what you did, that’s what I’m trying to tell you. Stop trying to justify it with love or whatever reason. Just stop trying to make it right. What you did is on you. On us, truth to be said. You’re no hero.”_

_“Maybe I don’t have to be.” Said Max with anger, raising her voice. “Maybe I am not supposed to be Super Max. I just… I just want to be Max. Just Max.”_

_Her words echoed through the strange scenario when her other self smiled. It was a cold but polite smile._

_“Exactly”_

_Silence fell while the three girls looked at each other awkwardly. Max closed her eyes and tried to gather all the strength and resolve she had left. She needed to be better, she needed to fix herself in order to do something to make up for her choices._

_She felt Rachel stand up and walk away from her, but she didn’t open her eyes._

_“I think you know what you have to do now. Right?” She asked. “You need to move forward. What’s done is done, you can’t keep guilt tripping yourself about the choices you made. You choose. And now, you have to deal with it instead of keep trying to fix stuff you can’t control.”_

_“And what about… the other stuff?” Max asked, looking at the girls standing in front of her. Their expression went shadowy for a moment._

_“The other stuff will not go away either, Max.” Rachel said, sadly. “Your experiences, even if they were in another realities, will stuck with you. Just like what happened to the town. You’ll have to deal with your demons, but… one at a time.”_

_“So I’ll be broken forever?” Max insisted. “I’ll just… have Jefferson’s voice in my head and all those awful flashes about what happened? I’ll keep having nightmares about Chloe dying awfully?”_

_“Probably. Time doesn’t heal all wounds, you know that better than anyone.” The other Max said. “You have to accept what happened instead of deny it. Chloe is alive. She died, and was killed in other realities, but she’s alive in this one. And no more “I wasn’t in the dark room” bullshit. You know you were there. You escaped. And Jefferson is dead now.”_

_“He’s just in your mind as a memory and he can’t hurt you anymore.” Rachel added. “Unless you let him do it. It’ll take time, but you’ll get over it. I’m sure Chloe will help you a lot.”_

_The other Max snorted._

_“Yeah. She’s probably the only one keeping us together as it is. I bet you noticed you were not so into this multiple personality shit last night.”_

_“If you’re me, why are you always talking shit about Chloe? I… we love her.” Said Max, utterly furious with herself._

_“Because we weren’t sure if she loved us or we were just a replacement. We didn’t know how she felt, she could be using us.” Said the other Max, like it was obvious. “She did at some point, but she admitted it. She was pretty clear about her feelings too, and you saw it. Those eyes were not lying. So, it’s stupid to keep arguing. Part of us didn’t want to fall for her, not with that stuff about Rachel on the table and all the shit hitting the fan. There’s no news we aren’t exactly the most confident person. But we fell for her anyway. No point in denying it.”_

_“So, you’ll leave me the fuck alone? Finally?”_

_“I’m part of you, dumbass. I’m not going away. But I can try to not be a dick most of the time, unless you consider again to fucking torn apart reality with our stupid power. I couldn’t prevent it the last time, though.”_

_“I thought you were the one asking me to use it” Said Max, suddenly confused._

_“Technically, like I said, we are the same person. But no. I was the one reminding you, you had a promise to keep. I tried to guide our most selfish and stupid side to the right place. It didn’t turn out well, as you know.”_

_“I’m… lost.” Said Max rubbing her temples with the palm of her hands. A headache was breaking through her skull._

_“You don’t say?.” The other Max snorted again. “Shit gets confusing, amirite? Look, we both want the same thing. We just have different ways to coping with all this shit. We just want what you said. No super Max, no everyday hero bullshit, no creepy dark room, no stupid rewind powers with big ass consequences. We just want to be Max. As a whole. Not just a bunch of voices trying to make sense.”_

_“And how I’m supposed to do that?”_

_“Easy… well, not easy honestly, but simple. Think. Accept. And move the fuck on with your life. We’re lost. It’s time to find ourselves again. Who we really are. Without all that bullshit and rewind powers, without having all the right answers, without mom and dad issues and awful memories. We need to get our shit together. That’s how.”_

_"I know." Said Max in return. "I know."_

_Silence fell again as they exchanged cryptic looks. Rachel was the one who broke it, getting up and smiling at Max._

_“I think you’re ready to go back now.” She said._

_“I’m… not so certain about that… .”_

_“You are.” The blonde girl knelt before her and grabbed her by the shoulders, smiling softly. For a moment, Max couldn’t help but think that Chloe was right when she described her as an angel, even this Rachel wasn’t the real one. “You’ll do better this time. And… we’ll not see each other again.”_

_“Wait… I know this is all in my head, but… it feels so real…”_

_“And who said it isn’t?” Replied the blonde, stroking her hair behind her ear, making the blue feather dance against her neck._

_Max smiled softly and nodded._ _The girl began to walk away with a bright smile on her face. Max closed her eyes softly, letting the dark and silence drag her back to reality._

 

 


	8. This ends tonight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was in part a collab with my buddy Julian (http://chaosontour.deviantart.com/) who was beta reading this fic, and my other works too.  
> If you have the time, check his profile. He's an amazing writer and editor :)

_“Well… what’s the plan?”_

_The girls were sitting against the exterior wall of the Blackwell Gym. Chloe was sipping hot, tasteless tea, from a metal cup she was holding with both hands. Her shoulder was leaning against Max’s, who was sitting right next to her. Both of them were looking at the sad image which was Arcadia Bay almost completely destroyed._

_“Honestly, I have no idea.” Max sighed, massaging her temples, trying to think. “I suppose I should be straight forward with this. I made a decision and they will have to respect that, whether they like it or not.”_

_“I know I’m not exactly subtle, Mad Max…” Said Chloe with a sigh. “But there is not much you can say to them either.” Chloe said, pursing her lips. “I mean, all the mind-fuck time travel powers are off the table…”_

_“Of course. I may be going insane, but I don’t want to give them the perfect excuse to send me to an asylum.” Max said, shaking her head. “Besides, that’s not exactly the main reason I am here, you know…”_

_“Well, maybe they already want to send you to an asylum and got a masterplan figured out.” Chloe joked, trying to lighten the mood a little. “If you tell your Mom that you don’t want to go back because you’re dating ME, of all people…, she’ll totally think you’ve lost your shit.”_

_Max looked at her, frowning, but with the shadow of a smile lingering on her lips._

_“Dating, huh?” Teased her._

_“You know what I mean…” Said Chloe, rolling her eyes._

_“Since I can’t tell them I’m staying here because of Joyce, my friends and that I’m the overall cause for what happened…, I may have to use that for a reason...”_

_Chloe snorted audibly, looking at Max, expecting to find a hint that the brunette was joking. There was no trace of amusement in her face._

_“You’re actually going to get out of the closet in a fucking FEMA camp?” Asked Chloe. “Unbelievable. And I thought I was the “misbehaving one” in this relationship.”_

_“It’s not like I have a better option, Chlo.” Max rolled her eyes in exasperation. “It’s not exactly the best moment to do it, not after all the crap they pulled out yesterday but… honestly I don’t know what to tell them.  You’re the only person I’m able to talk about what happened. Leaving aside the stupid voices in my head and of course the freaking nightmares and stuff….”_

_“I know. That kinda sucks, though.”_

_“No shit.” Max sighed in resignation. “The only thing I know is that whatever happens and whatever I have to go through to get my shit together, I can’t do it without you.”_

_Chloe put the half empty cup of tea aside and embraced Max, dragging her closer. The smaller girl rested her head on Chloe’s shoulder. She seemed so tired and worried… even if she tried to lighten the mood with the teasing and the little jokes, Chloe could see beyond that mask. A disaster hidden by her big doe eyes and her multitude of freckles._

_“We’ll be okay, Max.” Said Chloe, squeezing her a little. “I’m sure we will.”_

_She almost felt like she was lying to Max. All the pressure of the past few days had been crushing onto her, already tormented, mind and feelings. The past week must have been the darkest she had ever experienced in her whole life. Considering all the events which had happened, there still was this spark that brought her thoughts back to her usual punk-rock way of thinking. The spark in form of a person who had enlightened her and made her happy like she hadn’t felt in years. She rested her head against Max’s, closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Chloe squeezed her already closed eyes even further, trying to wipe away the negative thoughts and memories._

_“C’mon life… just. Fucking. Fire. Your. Gun. At. Us…”._

 

 

If she only had known at this moment that shit was about to go down... again... That they wouldn’t even have the time to catch a breath between things going to hell and back. All their relaxation and processing of the past events would “freeze” in a moment of time. That it would drown in the desperate desire for silence, which Chloe saw in Max’s eyes when everything “stopped” and left just the two of them in what seemed to be “forever”. 

Chloe was walking in circles, her hands stuffed in her pockets, holding on to her phone and pack of cigarettes like a lifeline. It wasn’t even four in the afternoon and she had smoked almost a dozen of them since she woke up. Her hands were shaking as she tried to hold back the urge of taking another one.

_“Keep your shit together, Chloe.”_ She demanded, speeding up her nervous wandering.

She fixed her piercing blue eyes in Pompidou, sitting near her with his gaze on her face. He stopped following her a while back when he noticed she wasn’t going anywhere and there was no way to get her attention. The dog seemed anxious, like he wanted to calm his “new owner” somehow.

She widened the circles and was wandering around their tent now, trying to ignore the fact that Ryan and Vanessa Caulfield were just a couple of meters away from her. They were sitting on a couple of plastic chairs and Max’s mother was crying her eyes out. Ryan seemed equally worried and angry about her at the same time. Humanly, Chloe tried to stay as far away as possible. She was highly cautious never to lose sight of the tent, just in case the doctor would come out.

Max was inside, still unconscious and constantly supervised by a nurse and a doctor from the relief effort since she had collapsed, apparently due to extreme exhaustion. No symptoms of any kind besides elevated heart rate and weakness. And a bloody nose, of course.

 

 

_“What… what the fuck did you do?” …was all Chloe managed to say, looking around in awe._

_Everything was… still. Vanessa and Ryan were like two angry statues, shouting at each other silently in front of them. The guy who just happened to pass by them, was still in the middle of a step, his gaze fixed in the two adults with a curious expression. The birds that were flying over their heads were suspended in the air, like a grotesque decoration in the blue and cold sky._

_Everything seemed frozen… except for the two girls._

_Fear crawled over Chloe’s skin and made every single hair in her neck stand on end. A million questions run through her mind in seconds as her eyes looked at Max, just at her side. She could feel her fingers shaking, afraid of losing contact with the brunette’s wrist. Afraid to freeze as well._

_When their eyes met, she could see a spark of realization in Max’s, like she just noticed what she had done. She had promised not to play with time anymore just a couple of hours ago! Now they were standing in a piece of time, still like a photograph. And somehow, Chloe wasn’t affected. Was it because she was next to Max? Could she even control that? Why she didn’t do it before? Was it because she was grabbing her arm or…?_

_Chloe’s head seemed  about to explode. And then anger struck her like a hammer. Why? She promised not to do this anymore! Her powers destroyed this town and now she’s using them? Again? Would they have to deal with another disaster? Would it be an earthquake this time? A meteorite? What the fuck was going on in her head?_

_Max lowered her hand and time kept on floating again. The heated voices of Max’s parents raised again, breaking the silence, the birds resumed their flight and the world continued spinning, like nothing had happened. But something did happen. And Chloe wasn’t sure what to think about that._

_Max looked at her with guilt, bright in her blue doe eyes. She seemed so worn out, so exhausted… so pale…_

_Blood leaked from her nose and lost itself on her pink lips, leaving a trail of red over her pale skin and Chloe felt every one of her nerves on fire. The panic she already had intensified and a chill ran down her spine when she slowly realized what was going on. Max was about to blackout again. Like in the beach. She could see it in her unseeing eyes, fixed on nothingness. She was about to slip away again and she wasn’t sure to be capable of handling it this time. It was like the world, her world in this case, fell apart again._

_“Max?” Chloe said, knowing that the girl wasn’t listening. Instinctively, she grabbed her in her arms the very moment her knees failed and she collapsed. “MAX!”_

_“What’s wrong?! What happened?!” Ryan voice raised over Vanessa’s, shaking in panic._

_“Max!? MAX?!”_

_“No… no, no, no, don’t you dare.”_ _Whispered Chloe, her eyes fixed in Max’s pale face. She brushed off the choppy hair from her forehead as she sat on the floor, holding the smaller girl fiercely in her arms. “Max… please… I can’t lose you too. Not like this. Please…” Chloe said, pressing her forehead against Max’s. She could feel the tears rolling down her cheeks._

__Someone tried to make her release the iron grip she had on Max’s unconscious body. She fought it, her teeth clenched, her fists tight and her eyes spilling tears. She’d not be torn apart from her, no fucking way. They’d have to kill her to do it._ _

_“Help! We need a doctor!”_

_“What’s happening, Chloe?” Asked Ryan, his tone low but the panic very present in it. “You know what’s wrong, please tell me… what’s wrong with my girl?”_

_Chloe shook her head. She caressed Max’s pale cheek with one hand, her eyes never leaving her. She couldn’t speak, she couldn’t answer the questions. She just could whisper the same words over and over, like a prayer._

___“Please… Please… Don’t go...”_ _ _

 

 

The voice of the doctor, coming out of the tent snapped her out of her memories. He was followed by the nurse that helped Max when they arrived at camp just a couple of days ago.

“How’s she?” Asked Chloe shakily, before Vanessa and Ryan had the chance. “She’ll be fine?”

“Don’t worry.” Said the doctor with a little smile. “She is just exhausted and probably dealing with a slight case of PTSD, something very common in this cases.” The doctor fixed his gaze in Max’s parents, frowning his full eyebrows. “ I’m sure she’ll be fine, but we’d like to keep an eye on her for a couple of days here. She’s too exhausted to go anywhere for now but I suggest she’d go home when she’s vital again to have proper rest and get her some psychological support”. Chloe’s organs crimped in pain, triggered by the doctor’s words.

“…anyways she seemed a little reluctant to the idea” he continued.

“She’s awake?” Asked Chloe.

If Max was indefectibly going to Seattle, then that’s where Chloe would have to be, even if that meant to live in the cab of her truck like a homeless until she recovered. She could deal with that better than be left alone again in what was left of Arcadia Bay.

“She woke up a couple of minutes ago and answered some of my questions. But I’m not sure if she had enough energy to be awake more than that. You may enter now, but I have to ask you to not put her into more stress that she already has.” The doctor fixed his dark eyes in Max’s parents, making them look away ashamed. “If she feels tired, please let her sleep. I’ll come back to check on her in a couple of hours. Miss Price, Ms. and Mr. Caulfield…

The doctor walked away and Chloe entered the tent, ignoring Max’s parents deliberately. They caused this mess and there was no way they’d be able to break Chloe apart from Max.

Obstinately, she grabbed a chair and sat down besides Max’s bed. The girl was asleep of course, her head resting over the hard pillow, a little tilted to the right. The dark spots under her eyes were still visible, but she looked better. Less pale and less worried. Chloe brushed away the hair from her forehead with a slight movement, like a caress.

“You need to stop doing that.” Chloe whispered in frustration. “You promised, damn it… What the hell I’m gonna do if you’re gone, Max?”

Chloe cupped the brunette’s hand with both of hers and rested her forehead against them. She inhaled deeply, trying with all her strength and resolve not to cry. She shivered when she felt a hand squeezing her shoulder and raised her head in confusion. Her reddish wet eyes stumbled with Vanessa’s and for a moment, Chloe felt so embarrassed and ashamed that wanted the ground to swallow her. But she didn’t find coldness or anger in the woman’s eyes, just worry and maybe a little of shame too.

“Chloe I… I wanted to apologize.” She said, her voice shaky. She seemed to be doing an incredible effort to find the right words and hold her tears at the same time. “I was just… so worried about her when the news came in and we couldn’t contact her in any way… I wasn’t thinking straight and I was… unsure of how to react to Max’s attitude. She… seems so different from the girl we drove here a couple of months ago…”

Chloe sighed. She wanted to argue, or at least part of her wanted to. That angry part of her wanted to shout, to tell Vanessa she was responsible for this mess, even if it wasn’t entirely true. It was easier to blame her instead of thinking about Max’s decision of breaking the promise she pronounced just hours ago and probably screw up time and universe again.

But she felt so tired, so sick of fighting, so worried and worn out with all that happened… She just nodded silently, returning her attention to Max’s face.

“You… know what happened to her?” Vanessa asked, her eyebrows forming a single line of worry. “Did she tell you something?”

“She… she told you guys. Not exactly in detail but you got the idea. She…” Chloe struggled a little with the lump in her throat. “She had a really hard and complicated week and… when the storm hit… we ended up at the lighthouse… and we watched the tornado swallow the town. We… we saw everything.”

“She…”

The lump in her throat intensified. She wasn’t sure why she was talking about it but she couldn’t manage the odd need to express the importance of what Max did. And what it meant to her, so maybe someone else besides them both could understand. It was a crappy way to feel since it was obvious she couldn’t do it. At least not entirely. She couldn't tell Vanessa the truth of course. No way someone could believe it anyway, so Chloe thought that the least she could do was to tell them as much as she could without crossing that line. Everybody lies, no exceptions. Not even Chloe.

“She saved my life. She’s the only reason I’m here now.” She finally said, her eyes fixed on Max’s face. She couldn’t help but sob audibly.

“Even if it sounds ridiculous…, we are the reason the town is fucked up too. I’m sorry Vanessa, there is no way I could explain you how and why… that’s why she wants to stay so badly. We only have each other to sort this out.”

To her surprise, Vanessa hugged her tight. She didn’t know how to react to that, when just a couple of hours ago, the woman was shouting at her with the most severe expression she saw.

Instead of questioning, the woman just said one more thing.

“I’m so sorry, Chloe. So, so, sorry.”

“Yeah… me too.”

 

 

They spent the rest of the evening watching over Max in shifts and slowly but surely, the ice between the three of them started to melt.

After Vanessa’s apology, the awkward situation improved a little. None of them talked about what Max said that afternoon, for whatever reason. Chloe was kind of grateful for that, if it wasn’t for the constant glances they gave her. She wasn’t sure if they were evaluating her or just trying to figure out if Max’s words were true. And Chloe, sure as hell, wasn’t prepared to have “the talk” with her… “actually about to be Mother and father In-law?” She snorted mentally at the label. It all seemed so… surreal.

Besides, her mind was definitely somewhere else. While Max’s sleep kept uninterrupted, her thoughts rumbled about what she did, about the possible consequences they may or may not have to deal with. At least Max was safe, physically, from whatever made her collapse like that, according to the doctor.

Chloe felt like her head was about to explode, both literally and figurative.

Despite her awkwardness, Chloe never left Max’s side and when she fell asleep sitting on the chair, Ryan woke her up softly, shaking her by the shoulder.

“Sorry.” He apologized with a little smile, looking how Chloe rubbed off the sleep from her eyes and looked at him, half confused, half worried. “Why don’t you go to bed, Chloe? You’re exhausted. We’ll be outside if you need anything.”

“Yeah… okay…”

Ryan gave her a reassuring smile and squeezed her shoulder a little before leaving the tent and closed the zipper behind him.

Chloe changed her clothes and went to her folding bed and cover herself with the blankets, trying to fight the cold. She shivered, turned around and tried to fall asleep again, in vain. She felt uneasy, itchy and incapable of looking away from Max’s peaceful expression. It was the first night at camp that the younger girl wasn’t trembling or talking in her sleep or breathing fast. Chloe envied her apparent dreamless sleep.

_“Oh, fuck it.”_ She growled internally and got up. 

Chloe pushed her folding bed until it was just besides Max’s, forming a precarious double bed and slipped under the covers again. Max’s warm presence was comforting and scared away the cold in not time. The blue haired girl softly caressed the freckled cheek with her thumb.

“I don’t know why you did it.” She whispered, almost to herself. “I don’t know why you did it and… I actually don’t care if the world is going to burn to the ground for it. As you’re here with me I think that now I kinda know how you felt on top of that stupid cliff. And if this is what you feel… I know why you don’t regret your choice.”

Without waking up, Max rolled to her side, facing Chloe. She leaned her head over Chloe’s hand and… smiled a little, like she was actually hearing her words.

Chloe smiled in return and leaned closer, stealing a small kiss from her lips. And after that, sleep came easy, drowning Chloe in a soft and bright dream without shootings in bathrooms, blue butterflies, tornados ripping reality apart and impossible choices which had to be made.

She dreamed of Max’s warm and bright smile, her soft hands playing with her hair. Chloe’s blue eyes sparkling with a gaze full of love which she wanted to treasure for the rest of her life.

Whatever tomorrow would throw at them.

Whatever happened or tormented them in the past…

_“This ends tonight…”_ she thought. _“We’re safe and sound”_

 

**Author's Note:**

> Like I always say, english is not my mother language, so I'm sure there will be more than a few mistakes, so I apologize in advance. And, if you're willing to lend me a hand and point them out, I'll be grateful.
> 
> Let me know what you think, I'll really appreciate the feedback!  
> And of course, thanks for reading!


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